IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by fast foods. This has a negative impact on families, individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #foods #impact #families #individuals #society
Food
 is a necessary part of our life. Eating habits of our ancestors are replacing with unhealthy
food
. Which has a bad effect on our youth society and families. And I strongly agree with
this
 extent. To commence with, our traditional
foods
 are going to replace with unhealthy junk
foods
.
However
, our youth mostly prefer to eat
this
 kind of unhealthy
food
.
For example
, burgers pizza etc, these kinds of unhealthy junk
food
 are rapidly growing up which demolish our cultural
foods
.
For instance
, if we organise a party we prefer fast
food
.Because it's a trend now.
Additionally
, these days no one likes to eat their cultural
foods
 in
this
 situation our cultural
food
 is rapidly disappearing. Which strongly affects our society's masses and families.
Moreover
, these kinds of
food
 habits damage our health. People who ignore their traditional
food
 responsible for the negative effect on their culture family and people. To cite an example, our ancestors used bread and homemade
food
 for daily life but now the masses enjoy more fast
foods
.
Hence
, fast
food
 lovers make their culture society masses and families negatively affect. They should prefer their cultural
foods
 which are healthy and to have shown their traditional identity in the world.
Submitted by zoyadilawar34 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • obesity
  • diabetes
  • cultural identity
  • heritage
  • local economy
  • employment
  • family dynamics
  • bonding time
  • carbon footprint
  • non-sustainable farming
  • nutritional value
  • healthcare costs
  • traditional cooking skills
  • cultural diversity
  • packaging
  • on-the-go lifestyle
What to do next:
Look at other essays: