Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is the case? Is this a positive or negative development?

#children #hours #smartphones #case #development

The use of mobile calls

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apply

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is increasing dramatically worldwide. The majority of the young generation spends most

second

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seconds

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daily using handsets.

This

essay will discuss the cause of

this

situation and will elaborate on the negative impact of

this

situation.

To begin

, there are numerous reasons why most youngsters are addicted to dial.

Firstly

due to

advanced technology and modernization handsets are now readily available and accessible to everyone including children. ,

However previously

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mobile phones were

very

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expensive that few individuals could afford them, so not everyone could own one. Nowadays parents who do not have ample term for their kids mostly purchase the device for them so they

could

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can

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get a sort of company by playing games with them or learning rhymes. For ,example about 62% of folks of 7-17 years are using smartphones which were bought by their parents in Ghana. Most parents argued that handsets are able to compensate for the quality season they missed out on with their wards.

Also

adolescent in boarding school uses the device to keep in touch with their families and friends.

Furthermore

, I think that kids using cell phones have various drawbacks. I am saying

this

because kids are now developing so they

turned to be

Verb problem

become

show examples

naive and with these ,gadgets there are numerous content and applications which are not suitable for the junior population to watch or listen to. Especially when there is no parental guidance because programs

such

as phonographic and violent movies might distort their behaviour. For ,instance my friends who started watching those films at a tender age are now promiscuous. In ,addition smartphones could distract adolescent's focus and attention from their books to watching different entertainment shows, which might go a long way to reduce their academic performance. In conclusion, most youngsters spend quality time each day on their smartphones. In

this

,essay I discussed the reasons for

this

occurrence and its disadvantages on children's behaviour and academic performance.

Submitted by yeboahsamuellaabban on Fri Apr 28 2023

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Task Achievement

The essay partially addresses the task but lacks depth and clarity in discussing the impact of children's smartphone usage. More specific examples and evidence are needed to support the main points.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay demonstrates basic coherence and cohesion through the use of linking words and a clear introduction and conclusion. However, the logical flow of ideas needs improvement, and the essay lacks sufficient development of the main points.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

325 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

smartphones
usage
technology
accessibility
convenience
entertainment
gaming
social media
communication
educational resources
addiction
dependence
negative effects
physical health
mental health

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