The following diagrams show a current map of Peyton Park and plans for proposed changes. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make a comparison where relevant.

#diagrams #show #peyton #park #plans #changes #information #features #comparison

The map shows

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apply

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the town of Garlsdon and there are two possible spots where a new supermarket will be located. There

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are

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two available sites, S1 and S2.

Overall

, by using transportation and cars, S1 is

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a more

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convenient place rather than S2.

To begin

with, there are some

differeces

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differences

between S1 and S2. S1 is located in the NorthWest of

Correct article usage

the twon

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twon

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town

two

centre,

while

S2 is in the

center

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centre

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town

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the town

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centre where is no traffic zone. The main roads are located

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the NorthEast side of S1 and

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apply

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towards to NorthWest. 12km far from S1 population can be easily moved to S1 by using the main roads and railway.

On the other hand

, S2 is in no traffic zone, so if

supermarket

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the supermarket

a supermarket

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is placed in here, people should go there on foot rather than

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by cars

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cars

Fix the agreement mistake

car

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. A large portion of

industry

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the industry

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is circled to S2,

while

industry

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the industry

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site is only placed in the SouthEast of S1.

Also

, 15000 and 29000 population, respectively far from Bransdon, 16km and 25km can access to

twon

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two

town

of Garlsdon by main roads. From the

center

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centre

show examples

of town, in both North and South, there are housing parts.

Submitted by nursemk1991 on Sat Apr 29 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

192 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

diagrams
current map
proposed changes
summarize
main features
comparison
relevant

What to do next:

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The following diagrams show a current map of Peyton Park and plans for proposed changes. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make a comparison where relevant.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

People find it difficult to speak in public or to give a presentation before an audience. Do you think public speaking skills are really important? Do you agree that public speaking should be taught at school?

Some believe that it is a natural process for animal species to become extinct and therefore, there is no reason to try to prevent this from happening. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people today believe that the world’s increase in population is unsustainable and will eventually lead to a global crisis. Other people believe that a world population increase is necessary and beneficial as it creates the growth of the world’s economy and society.

Some people think that young people should spend free time with families instead of outside entertainment; others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.