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Band 4.5

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries. What problem does this cause? What solutions can you suggest to deal with this situation?

#professionals #doctors #teachers #countries #situation
Nowadays,
growing
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a growing
show examples
 number of salaried professionals are moving from developing countries to developed
nations
.
This
essay
 will discuss what problems it
cause
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causes
show examples
 including
loss
 of expertise and
loss
 of revenue to the source country.
This
essay
 will
also
 suggest solutions to these problems including improving infrastructure and salaries. Professionals who go
elsewhere
 end up leaving a large gap
that is
 not easy to fill. Consider doctors in developing
nations
 who move to
developed
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the developed
show examples
 world for better opportunities. There may not be enough qualified people left to replace them when they leave, which affects the quality of health care for those who
left
Add a missing verb
are left
show examples
 behind. Another effect is
loss
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the loss
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 of revenue. Governments rely on income taxes to fund their social programs and infrastructure projects. A mass exodus leads to a drop
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 tax
reciepts
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receipts
 which can stunt economic growth and development.
While
 there is
not
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no
show examples
easy
Add an article
an easy
show examples
 fix for these problems, there are
somethings
Correct your spelling
some things
show examples
 government can do to reduce or minimize
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
.
Firstly
, governments should invest to improve the infrastructure and
heatlh
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health
 care as
indivduals
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individuals
 want to see that the taxes they are paying are used in
correct
Correct article usage
the correct
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 ways to improve their quality of life.
Secondly
, the payment needs to be structured and proper incentives should be paid whenever necessary.
The salaries
Correct article usage
Salaries
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 are one of the most important economic
fators
Correct your spelling
factors
 that lead
this
 movement of professionals as employees find the payment attractive in other countries. In conclusion, more and more people are moving to developed
nations
 from third-world countries in search of better-paying job opportunities.
This
essay
 discussed how
this
 exodus is causing issues like
loss
 of expert minds and
loss
 of revenue to developing
nations
.
This
essay
also
 suggests that solutions to
this
 problem are twofold: governments should invest to improve public services and provide competitive salaries.
Submitted by lalit.malik1885 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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