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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people feel that entertainments ej film stars pop musicians or sports stars, are paid too much money? Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of job should be highly paid?

#people #entertainments #ej #film #stars #pop #musicians #sports #money #job
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A lot of
people
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 consider
stars
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 of film, music or sports to be overpaid.
This
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 essay completely disagrees with that statement. Famous
people
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 receive high payments
due to
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 their huge amount of hours of everyday work and the lack of privacy that famous
people
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 have.
Although
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 some
people
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 can underestimate celebrities' jobs, it is not easy to fulfil all that these types of professions demand. Musicians have to spend many hours per day in studios practising and creating new songs. About sports
stars
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, they have to do intense workouts to stay fit and healthy making them able to do a good performance when they have to compete. Film
stars
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also
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 spend days filming movies without stopping. They are
also
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 having to move from one country to another really often leading to a lack of stability for them and their families.
For example
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, Messi, a football player, moves every 6 months to a different country.
Furthermore
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,
stars
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 have to deal with their fans. Despite they may feel grateful for having so many
people
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 loving and following them, sometimes they want to be able to have a normal life,
such
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 as going shopping, to the beach or just a short quiet walk in their surroundings.
For instance
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, the actor Johnny Deep once talked on a tv program about how much not having privacy affects his life, staying in his house
instead
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 of going out just to avoid having to talk with his followers. Unfortunately, professionals from other fields deserve to have better payment. Some degrees related to health
such
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 as nurses or nutritionists should have a higher salary. All the effort they put into studying for so many years and the important role they have in our society is not been reflected in their wages.
To conclude
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, in order to disagree with the payment that famous
people
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 have, governments should take into consideration that some types of jobs should be much better appreciate and receive a pay raise
due to
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 the importance of what they do.
Submitted by jimeilaria on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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