The breakthrough in medical sciences are by far the most significant advances in the world society over the last two centuries. Discuss this statement and give your opinion

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Most
people
consider that the administration should finance oscillation, occupation and
musicfor
Correct your spelling
music for
teenagers
while
another part believes that these
activities
should
be provide
Change the verb form
be provided
show examples
with money by businessmen or by their
parents
.
This
essay will discuss both these points of view and argue in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
of the letter. Almost all
people
agree that the local government should pay
extracurricular
Change preposition
for extracurricular
show examples
activities
for instance
making music, arts and dance
therefore
they think that if authorities take on
this
issue, it will open new
courses
which will engage these
activities
. Most
children
attend these classes since they are public
as a consequence
it is the most significant advantage. All over the
world
Add a comma
,world
show examples
no one is financially equal thereby we cannot discover all
children
who have talent
thus
if they are public, most
children
will take
course
Add an article
the course
a course
show examples
. Some
people
believe that families or private ownerships should ensure financial of
courses
although
it is damage to their budgets, some
people
superior
this
way than public way. In
fact
Add a comma
,fact
show examples
we know that
parents
and private sectors have capitalized
extracurricular
Change preposition
on extracurricular
show examples
activities
in Australia since 1989 thereby almost 89 percent
children
Change preposition
of children
show examples
take
courses
. Most
parents
choose
this
method as they have a chance to choose any course consequence it is
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
important edge and
also
if private businesses finance these
activities
, they will improve education at the
courses
. In my view families and private businesses should pay tuition fees
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
courses
as I think that some
parents
want to choose course locations, teachers, meals and
also
native
Correct pronoun usage
their native
show examples
language. In conclusion, most
people
have different thoughts
while
we generally divide 7 o parts
therefore
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
part
consider
Change the verb form
considers
show examples
that local authorities pay
courses
Change preposition
for courses
show examples
payment,
second
Correct article usage
the second
show examples
part
believe
Change the verb form
believes
show examples
that
children
's
parents
or private businesses should finance music, dance and
arts
Change the noun form
art
show examples
lessons. On the whole, I guess
parents
and private!
Submitted by emilqasimov049 on

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Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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