IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart shows the changes that took place in three different areas of crime in Newport city center from 2003-2012

The chart shows the changes that took place in three different areas of crime in Newport city center from 2003-2012
#changes #place #three #areas #crime #newport #city #center
This
 given chart displays crime in
new
Add an article
the new
a new
show examples
 port city in three different kinds of crime from 2003 to 2012. In 2003,
Burglary
 started the
number
 at 3400 and rose to 3700 in 2004, four years later the
number
 extremely decreased to 1200 in 2008 and slightly rose to 1500 in 2009. Between 2009 to 2012, the
number
 of
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
almost
Add a missing verb
was almost
show examples
 stable at 1400. The
number
 of
car
theft
 in 2003 was 2700 and almost no change till 2005.
Furthermore
, one
year
 later the
statistic
 fell to 2000 and slowly increased
year
 by
year
 to the same
number
 in 2003 at 2700 cases.
Robbery's
Change noun form
Robbery
show examples
 cases started the
number
 at 600 in 2003 and rose to 900 in 2005.
In contrast
, in three years the
statistic
 decreased to 500 and rose to 700 in 2010, but in 2011 the
number
 fell to 600 and increased to 700 in 2012. In the middle of 2006 and
2007
Add a comma
,2007
show examples
 the
number
 of
burglary
Change to a plural noun
burglaries
show examples
 and
car
theft
 was in the same
number
.
Overall
, the
number
 of
burglary
Change to a plural noun
burglaries
show examples
 decreased from 2003 to 2012.
Car
theft
shown
Wrong verb form
showed
show examples
 the same
statistic
with
Change preposition
as
show examples
 the
started
Replace the word
start
show examples
year
 and
robbery
 experienced increased in 2012. The higher cases
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
burglary
 happened in 2003,
car
theft
 in 2004, and
robbery
 in 2005. The
statistic
shown
Wrong verb form
show
show examples
 the lowest
number
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 incidents
happened
Correct pronoun usage
that happened
show examples
 in 2009 for
burglary
, 2006 for
car
theft
 and 2008 for
robbery
.
Submitted by ieltscuns2022 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words burglary, number, car, theft, year, statistic, robbery with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "fell" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: