IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

In some countries boarding schools are getting more popular. Is it a positive or negative development? What are the reasons behind it?

#countries #schools #development
In the modern world, A huge amount of people, from different societies, are concerned about giving children to stay in boarding schools. In my point of view, it is a positive development and it
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 various opportunities for
child
Add an article
the child
a child
show examples
. In
this
 essay, I will
disscuss
Correct your spelling
discuss
 about some of them. First of all, kids start
education
Correct pronoun usage
their education
show examples
 at 6 years old.
Usually
Add a comma
,Usually
show examples
 they have difficult
sillabus
Correct your spelling
syllabus
 and subjects, which include a lot of amount of information to learn.
In
Change preposition
As
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 result, it
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
 them very
nervious
Correct your spelling
nervous
 and
stresseful
Correct your spelling
stressful
. In
this
 case, some of
Add an article
the youngers
show examples
youngers
Correct your spelling
younger
show examples
 prefer to stay on
academy
Correct article usage
the academy
show examples
 campus. The reason why
because
Add a missing verb
is because
show examples
 it
save
Change the verb form
saves
show examples
 pretty much time and energy. On top of that, living apart makes a kid more self-confident and
assist
Correct subject-verb agreement
assists
show examples
 to make own decisions.
On the other hand
,
youngers
Correct your spelling
younger
show examples
 need family and parents' love and attention. It is very important to communicate with mom or dad, especially in
Correct article usage
the teenager
show examples
teenager
Replace the word
teenage
show examples
 ages.
For instance
,
researches
Correct your spelling
researchers
show examples
 investigate
assosiation
Correct your spelling
association
associations
, which
prove
Correct subject-verb agreement
proves
show examples
 that children become more responsible and kinder
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 if they live with relatives. As
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 result, in
Correct your spelling
adulthood
adulhood
Add a comma
,adulhood
show examples
 they are happier individuals than others. In conclusion, boarding academics started to be a
boom
Change the verb form
booming
show examples
 trend. There are some cases
why
Change preposition
of why
show examples
 it happened. I strongly believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 it is a positive development for society
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
this
 occasion
Submitted by olqa.zvereva01 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Advantages
  • Disadvantages
  • Advancements in education
  • Academic excellence
  • Social and personal development
  • Discipline and independence
  • Cultural diversity
  • Better facilities and resources
  • Parental pressure
  • Desire for a better future
What to do next:
Look at other essays: