It is a natural process for animal species to become extinct. There is no reason why people should try to prevent this from happening. Do you agree or disagree?

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Extinction
Correct article usage
The extinction

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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of species become a major concern in
whole
Change the article
the whole

It appears that the phrase whole world does not contain the correct article usage. Consider making a change.

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world nowadays. Authorities are making efforts to prevent
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

animals
Change the noun form
animal

Your sentence appears to use the incorrect form of animals. Consider changing it to singular.

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species from vanishing. Some people believe these efforts are useless as it is
a
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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nature
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's activity to extinct
animals
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. I completely disagree with the idea and in
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay
Add a comma
,essay

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase in this essay. Consider adding a comma.

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I will support my opinion with examples.
Firstly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, a large number of
animals
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are dying because of human activities
as
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as making roads, factories and so on. By limiting the construction, a number of species can be saved which will
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

prevent our environment.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

- Government should construct only one road to go from point A to B
instead
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

of making multiple
path
Change to a plural noun
paths

The singular countable noun path follows the quantifier multiple, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.

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for
public's
Correct article usage
the public's

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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convenience. It will
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

save the money of
nation
Correct article usage
the nation

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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along with
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the
animals
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. Another reason why I disagree is that it can
be prevent
Change the verb form
be prevented

It appears that the form of the verb prevent does not work with be in this sentence.

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from happening by opening more zoos in
world
Add an article
the world

The noun phrase world seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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. The category which
are
Change the verb form
is

The plural verb are does not appear to agree with the singular subject The category. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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vanishing can be kept in these zoos under
a
Remove the article
apply

The indefinite article, a, may be redundant when used with the uncountable noun supervision in your sentence. Consider removing it.

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supervision and a lot can be done to extend their generation. By doing
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, governer authorities can
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

aware the public about
Correct article usage
the extincting
show examples
extincting
Correct your spelling
extinction

If you don’t want extincting to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

categories of
animals
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. On
other
Correct article usage
the other

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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hand, there is no denying to fact that
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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nature
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

plays a major role
to
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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extinct
Correct article usage
the extinct

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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some
Change preposition
of some

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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animals
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. A human cannot
done
Change the verb form
do
be done

The verb done after the modal verb can does not appear to be in the correct form. Consider changing the verb form.

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anything in order to keep them alive.
For
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

example-dinosaur's
Change noun form
example

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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generation could not
survived
Change the verb form
survive
be survived

The verb survived after the modal verb could does not appear to be in the correct form. Consider changing the verb form.

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because of the change in environment. So, some deaths of
catogaries
Correct your spelling
categories

If you don’t want catogaries to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

of
animals
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are part of
nature
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. In conclusion, a human can do
upto
Correct your spelling
up to

If you don’t want upto to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

some extent to save
animals
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

by limiting constructions and keeping
a rare breeds
Correct the article-noun agreement
rare breeds
a rare breed

The indefinite article a may not be required with the plural noun breeds in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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in
Change preposition
under

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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supervision but
a
Remove the article
apply

The indefinite article, a, may be redundant when used with the uncountable noun nature in your sentence. Consider removing it.

show examples
nature
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is doing its part which can not be controlled.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, public awareness is the only way to fight
with
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

problem.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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