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Band 2.5

Some people believe that it is important to spend a lot of money on family celebration while others think it is waste of money

#people #money #celebration #waste
Family
Correct article usage
A family
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 is a group
people
Change preposition
of people
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 related by blood or by marriage
While
celebration
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the celebration
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 is gathering
people
 when
good
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a good
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 thing has happened .
Family
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A family
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celebration
 is when you are gathering the whole family to celebrate something special . I Remy years back my aunt's wedding that took place in December it was a festival period which made all of us come down and brought the whole family together because I got to see my uncles and aunties I haven'
t
 seen in years time including my grandparents it was so much fun we laughed told jokes and it was a special kind of bond . Some
people
 didn'
t
 like it because of the
money
 involved each family was supposed to contribute a particular amount of
Correct your spelling
money
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mone
Correct your spelling
money
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that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 made it look like u re spending
money
 unnecessary Because at that time my parents weren'
t
 ok and
where
Correct your spelling
were
show examples
 Angry about the
money
 issues because of our financial state
then
 so
this
 is why I
woul
Correct your spelling
would
 say that
people
 don'
t
 like
family
Add an article
a family
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celebration
Fix the agreement mistake
celebrations
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 because of the
money
 aspects. Regardless I think
family
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a family
the family
show examples
celebration
 is a good idea because we got to see them before
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 travelled. Would love to have my own wedding like that I saw the loved and happiness it brought to us
Submitted by oludayotemilade on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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