Chart below shows Anthropology graduates from one university did after finishing high school degree course showing their salary grade after 5 years.
Illustrated by
pie
chart is the Correct article usage
the pie
graduates
of destination of Anthropology graduates
of a college while
the table depicts various monthly payment
for different kinds of Fix the agreement mistake
payments
job
. Units measured in percentages.
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
Overall
, it is evident that a significant proportion of newly
Replace the word
new
graduates
were the majority while
daily staff and part-time employees shown
as the least.Add a missing verb
were shown
According to
the governmental salary earners , they were paid highly compared with other workers
. However
, personal
company Add an article
the personal
revealed
to be the minority .
To start with , Add a missing verb
was revealed
anthropologist
mounted over half of graduate Fix the agreement mistake
anthropologists
workers
and 5% of fresh bachelor
degree Change noun form
bachelor's
holder
were one in twenty . Fix the agreement mistake
holders
Nevertheless
,non-
Correct your spelling
non-workers
workers
alumnus
were noticed to be below a quarter of the sector. Fix the agreement mistake
alumni
Consequently
, partially and unknown graduates
of Anthropology accounted to
8% exhibiting Change preposition
for
a similar trends
.
Next , from the tabular illustration, authority sectoral bodies were placed highly Correct the article-noun agreement
a similar trend
similar trends
since
Change preposition
in
period
of five years Add an article
the period
experienced
as half of the population .Comparingly ,Change the form of the verb
experience
free- lance
consultants and government earners were categorized evenly with $25,000- 49,999 and $50,000-74,999 as 5% and 15% for each group . Correct your spelling
free-lance
In contrast
,it differs by two- fifths
for freelance candidates though less than a third of government salaried Correct your spelling
two-fifths
workers
,both had $ 75,000 -99,999 . Lastly
, private establishment
Fix the agreement mistake
establishments
recorded
as the lowest proportion with less thanAdd a missing verb
were recorded
two- thirds
of$100,00+ .Correct your spelling
two-thirds
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words graduates, workers with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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