some people think that individuals are responsible to take care of own health and diet. But some claim that it is government' s duty. Discuss both views.
Nowadays, individuals feel it is necessary for members of a family to lavish their income on family celebrations and others think it's a waste of resources. In my view, overspending money on life's moments
due to
society's pressure is not necessary. However
, one should also
make those events memorable. This
essay will discuss both views and derive a logical conclusion.
Firstly
, it is good to spend on family parties
especially when there is an event that is
usually celebrated once in a lifetime such
as wedding ceremonies. People
believe that wedding parties
come once and if not celebrated well now, they will not have other opportunities to do so later in the future. To make the family happy, they spend every bit of their earnings to host such
parties
. For example
, a pregnant woman who has waited for years before giving birth to a child will also
plan a very elaborate celebration for the entire family and friends because it is seen as a way of appreciating God for this
miracle.
On the other hand
, some people
see extravagantly spending on these home parties
as a waste because some get themselves involved in loans and even empty their bank savings in other to make those arrangements. Since people
want to show off their standards to society, they get themselves into trouble by taking loans or emptying their savings. For instance
, a person who has been attending family weddings for many years would like to leave a similar impression on others, even if a person has to take loans to fulfil that. Hence
, these are social norms that people
are following without any thought process behind them.
In conclusion, although
spending wealth on family celebrations cannot be avoided, there are other better things that the money can be channelled into which will also
benefit the family positively rather than doing things to please the masses by feeding them during funfair activities. Therefore
, people
should check their pockets rather competitive with society.Submitted by yoursvicky129 on
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task response
Well done on discussing both views and providing a clear conclusion. Make sure to address all aspects of the given topic in more detail for a higher score.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure, but consider enhancing the transition between paragraphs to improve coherence.
task response
Introduces both perspectives on the topic and provides a balanced argument
coherence and cohesion
Clear introduction and conclusion present
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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