Some people believe that it is important to spend a lot of money on family celebrations.while others think it is a waste of money.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Few people believe that it is mandatory to lavish more cash on family events ,
where
Correct word choice
whereas
show examples
assumed others thought it is a waste of resources.it is not a total waste of resources on a family party
instead
it creates bonds and harmony ,on the
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
other it can incur debt if one does not plan very well. Obviously, the family can simply be defined as the variety of the father ,mother and their children. I felt is a prudent decision for one to organise a family vacation ,once in a
while
to connect everyone together .Doing that alone helps to foster love, peace and extensive communication among each .And
also
create a kind of reunion which brings remarkable memory in the time to come.
Conversely
, having a time out with a family member I do not see it as an irrelevant occasion. Take ,
for example
,I had a cousin who had been away on the shores of Canada. for almost ten years,he made out plans to visit us during the Christmas season .
Although
,they were high tariffs on the cost of flight tickets.He was persuasive to come to Nigeria and see everyone back at home. It will be an unforgettable trip for him ,and
also
to part take in local dishes since he has been away for decades.
Furthermore
, expenditures on family feasts can
also
incur debt if the person does not plan well ,for the fact that one wants to give an impression of spending recklessly on a family event without saving for rainy days is not wise. After the merriment ,they are other bills awaiting ahead
such
as school fees, feeding, clothing and shelter e.t.c .which needed to be sorted out. Inconclusively, it is optimal to spend monetary resources on family parties not only on their demise ,so doing they should be an estimated budget in order to have an equilibrium scale .And not having to be worn out in unnecessary debts.
Submitted by oludayotemilade on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cherish
  • nurture
  • strengthen
  • bond
  • create memories
  • enjoyment
  • sense of belonging
  • reconnect
  • unite
  • traditions
  • create traditions
  • financial burden
  • priorities
  • moderation
  • budget
  • frugal
  • extravagant
What to do next:
Look at other essays: