Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?
Sugar
has become essential in many products
, such
as drinks
, snacks, and desserts. Sugar
causes health problems like diabetes. The products
are sold in the supermarket on a huge scale. Products
containing a lot of sugar
should be sold at a higher price to encourage people
to consume less sugar
. I will describe whether I agree or disagree with this
statement in this
essay.
In the modern era, food manufacturing is developed. They make some innovations to get more consumers. Two years ago in Indonesia, there was a phenomenon that surprise netizens. The first introduction of Thai tea. The drinks
are made from tea, milk
, and the important component is Correct word choice
and milk
sugar
. The drinks
were very sweet because of the ingredients. Since the price was cheap everyone wanted to try it. Not just in drinks
, but many food contains sugar
including rice. However
, humans have a limit to consuming sugar
every day. Taking sugar
at an abnormal amount is not good for the body. For example
, sugar
causes drawbacks such
as diabetes and hyperactivity in children. Diabetes can cause other illnesses, for
example
High blood pressure, Kidney problems, and stroke.
Add the comma(s)
,example
On the other hand
, Sugar
is a taste that everybody loves and can make people
happy. More choices in drinks
and beverages in the food industry, such
as desserts, drinks
, and snacks, make people
eat sugar
more and more. The innovations of manufacturing make people
put big interest on
it, the price of that Change preposition
in
products
is not high so that every people
can afford it. Sugar
is addictive, and somehow it is more dangerous than ecstasy.
To summarize, I strongly agree sugary products
should be sold at high prices because many disadvantages of it. Sugar
makes people
suffer from diseases and reduces human productivity, not just for adults but for children as well.Submitted by ieltscuns2022 on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite