In the past, people stored knowledge in books. Nowadays people store knowledge on the internet. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Recently, it is common for people to upload knowledge to the cloud rather than to memorise
them
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
in print media, which had been popular in the past. Despite there are some dangers of losing
information
due to
technical issues, I believe that the benefits of unlimited storage capacity and easy accessibility far outweigh any drawbacks. On the one hand, the main disadvantage of uploading everything to the Internet is the risk of losing
information
. If there is a cyber attack or a technical error, online content will disappear, and there is no feasible remedy to fix
this
problem.
This
would never happen if the
information
were stored in printed material, which was used widely in the past.
For example
, Conestoga College recently reported a cyber-attack on its e-library, which resulted in losing most of the scientific research in the chemistry department.
However
, I believe that technical problems can be prevented by using cybersecurity services from reputable companies to protect the data of individuals and organizations.
On the other hand
, I believe that the benefits of
this
trend are much more significant. In the past, people faced difficulties finding
information
because they had to read many books in a library or school. They
also
experienced the challenge of finding places to keep valued books because of the large number of them. In
this
era, people can store whatever they want in clouds or virtual spaces, which are not only inexpensive but
also
allow them to have unlimited capacity.
Moreover
, they
also
can easily access any knowledge with a click of a mouse, which is faster and more convenient than before.
For example
, OneDrive allows users to upload up to 500 GB to their accounts at only 10 US dollars annually, and they can download these files in less than 5 minutes. In conclusion, there is a drawback to using the Internet as an alternative storage solution regarding the risk of technical issues.
However
, it seemed to me that its advantages far outstrip
this
drawback in terms of the larger storage ability and the convenience of obtaining
information
.
Submitted by andrusishin.vit on

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task achievement
Your introduction is clear and sets the stage well for the rest of the essay. However, you could further strengthen your task response by elaborating a bit more on how the benefits outweigh the drawbacks.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph flows smoothly into the next to enhance coherence. More transitional phrases could be used to guide the reader through your argument.
task achievement
While your examples are relevant and well-chosen, one more specific example for each main point could provide additional support and strengthen your argument.
task achievement
You've provided specific, relevant examples that effectively support your main points. This is a strong aspect of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion. Each paragraph has a focused main idea.

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