IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people say that art subject such as painting and drawing should not be made compulsory for highschool students. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #art #highschool #students
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Arts
Use synonyms
 subject has become a required part
in
Change preposition
of
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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high
school
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 in many countries, there is a point saying that teenagers do not need to spend time learning these. I personally believe that every subject has
it
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
on
Correct your spelling
own
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 importance. I partly
agri
Correct your spelling
agree
 with the statement because of both benefits and drawbacks of teaching
art
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subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
 to high
school
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students
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.
To begin
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 with, there is no refutation
that's
Unnecessary verb
that
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 studying is advantageous to some extent. The first benefit is that
art
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 classes are of
form
Add an article
the form
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 of
recrational
Correct your spelling
recreational
activities
Fix the agreement mistake
activity
show examples
 for pupils. If these
students
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 only concentrate on academic
subjects
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, they are likely to experience stress or
depressed
Replace the word
depression
show examples
.
For example
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, learners need to learn 10 or more different academic
subjects
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 in High
school
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.
Additionally
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, putting
art
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 classes as
syllabus
Correct article usage
a syllabus
show examples
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
school
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 could help to discover talents.
Thus
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, it is better for these people
learn
Add the particle
to learn
show examples
art
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instead
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 of stressful
academy
Replace the word
academic
show examples
subjects
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.
In addition
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 to,
art
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subjects
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 in high
school
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 can bring some negative effect effects on
students
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.
Firstly
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, High academy
students
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 might have no time for other important
subjects
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such
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 as mathematics or languages if
arts
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subjects
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 are compulsory.
For example
Linking Words
, in Asian countries,high
school
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students
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 have to take three main
subjects
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 including maths, science,
English
Correct word choice
and English
show examples
 in the exam, which requires
students
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 to put much effort into these
subjects
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.
Secondly
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, it would be tough for those who are not interested in
arts
Use synonyms
subjects
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 to stay
focus
Wrong verb form
focused
show examples
 on the lecture.
Therefore
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,
this
Linking Words
 could be a waste of time and money. In conclusion, teaching
arts
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as painting or drawing could bring both positive and negative effects on
students
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.
However
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,
school
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 authorities should open
art
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 classes for children to entertain them but not be made compulsory
Submitted by info.rrtrailblazers on

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