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Band 4.5

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding changes. Others, However, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #lives #changes #change
Life
 is a long trip with different turns where we should make decisions. We chose the way we want to go. Every choice leads to
changes
 in our
life
. Experiencing alteration is inevitable. At the same
point
Add a comma
,point
show examples
 our choices let us
avoidus
Correct your spelling
avoid us
avoids
avoid
 to avoid
changes
. Some
people
 are
scaredpeople
Correct your spelling
scared people
 scared about
changes
, preferring a conventional way of living.
Such
 persons are afraid of accepting challenges, leading to fear of stress and depression, affecting
themtheir
Correct your spelling
them their
. ItThere is easier to live in the same place with the same schedule. In
this
case
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,case
show examples
people
 feel
safesafety
Correct your spelling
safe safety
.
This
 feeling is valuable.
Safe
Add an article
The safe
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 status allows one to
beallows
Correct your spelling
bellows
be allows
 to be healthy psychologically without fears about unclear situations. Other
people
 find stability quite boring. They
impressed
Add a missing verb
are impressed
show examples
 by
changes
 in
life
. Every new modification is a new opportunity to become happier. You never know what should you accept from
life
. Every suppressed situation can be a fate present, which
open
Correct subject-verb agreement
opens
show examples
 the broader perspective towards growth.
Usually
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,Usually
show examples
people
 with
such
position
Fix the agreement mistake
positions
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 are knowledgeable and successful. They are open to new
experience
Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
show examples
, curious and ready to change their mind. If about success, persons with
love
Correct article usage
a love
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
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 alterations face
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
many falls, after which they become stronger.
This
 experience allows them
achieve
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to achieve
show examples
 their goals because of patience, desire and confidence in their power. As for me, both opinions are similar.
However
, when regular
changes
 become
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
routine,
life
 starts to be the same. Honestly, I am in favour of alternations in activity. So I
prefere
Correct your spelling
prefer
find
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to find
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 the balance between stability and
changes
. There is no easy task, but in harmony with
Correct pronoun usage
ourselves
show examples
yourself
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,yourself
show examples
 we can achieve
this
.
Submitted by oimigle on

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • status quo
  • comfort zone
  • predictability
  • mastery
  • innovation
  • adaptability
  • personal growth
  • resilience
  • hesitancy
  • risk-taking
  • transitions
  • enrichment
  • equilibrium
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