IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Nowadays, many parents are sending their kids abroad to acquire good education. But, if and when these foreign educated students get back to their native country, they find it difficult to adjust themselves to the work life there. What kind of challenges do the people educated overseas face in their own country? What advice would you offer such people?

#parents #kids #education #students #country #work #life #challenges #people #face #advice #offer
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Over the
last
 few
decades
Add a comma
,decades
show examples
 it is believed
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
that parents can ensure
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
 of their children by sending
him
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 to study abroad.
However
,some of those who return back to their homeland suffer
for
Change preposition
from
show examples
 the local
job
 environment.
This
 essay will appraise
troubles
Correct article usage
the troubles
show examples
 which
students
 with oversea diploma suffer and some tips to overcome them. First of all,
Correct article usage
the relevence
show examples
relevence
Correct your spelling
relevance
 of the subject he studied abroad with the current
job
 market in his home country seems to have been the main concern of
foreign educated
Add a hyphen
foreign-educated
show examples
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
.
For
instance
Add a comma
,instance
show examples
 recent survey conducted by
British
Correct article usage
a British
show examples
journalist
Fix the agreement mistake
journalists
show examples
 revealed that the crucial reason why
students
 with
oversea
Correct article usage
an oversea
show examples
 diploma can’t get work in their field is that they can’t pass the exams for
Add an article
a subject
the subject
show examples
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
 which
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 are not
studied
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
 abroad,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 they are demanding in their homeland.
Therefore
,
students
 should be astute in
choice
Correct pronoun usage
their choice
show examples
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
subject,preliminarily after weighing all the pros and cons. The issue of choosing not demanded
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
 is a problem not only
students
Change preposition
for students
show examples
 who get their education abroad
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
students
Change preposition
for students
show examples
 who obtained domestic education.So many people in
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 few years applied for AI,law and engineering that
job
Correct article usage
the job
show examples
 market
inundated
Add a missing verb
is inundated
show examples
 with
specialist
Fix the agreement mistake
specialists
show examples
 in
this field
Fix the agreement mistake
these fields
show examples
.
Subsequently
,the matter of relevance of elected
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
 should not be overshadowed. To drive
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the conclusion,
relevance
Add an article
the relevance
show examples
 of selected subjects and
sphere
Correct article usage
the sphere
show examples
 of
job
 play
crucial
Add an article
a crucial
show examples
role
Fix the agreement mistake
roles
show examples
 in building the future of one’s,
therefore
 they
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
should
be chooses
Change the verb form
be chosen
show examples
 precisely.
Submitted by leylaorucova02 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • reverse culture shock
  • work ethic
  • communication styles
  • professional networks
  • industry needs
  • market demands
  • qualifications
  • overqualified
  • integration strategies
  • alumni networks
  • innovative practices
  • flexible mindset
  • overseas experience
  • domestic workforce
  • readjustment
What to do next:
Look at other essays: