Some people think that a huge amount of time and money is spent on protection of wild animals, and that this money could be better spent on the human population. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.
it is believed by some that a huge amount of time and money should be spent on protecting wild creatures,
while
others think the human population
are more important to focus on. Thus
, I certainly believe by preserving the wild animal's habitat will affect simultaneously to
the human Change preposition
apply
population
as well.
Environment
is indeed paramount these day
, Change the determiner
this day
these days
many
government and Correct word choice
and many
non profit
Add a hyphen
non-profit
organization
raising Fix the agreement mistake
organizations
voices
and Correct pronoun usage
their voices
focus
on animal conservation. Wrong verb form
focusing
To begin
with, animals
are essential on
Change preposition
in
food
chain cycle, Correct article usage
the food
however
, human activities threaten animal's existence on
Change preposition
in
the
nature, it is clearly seen Correct article usage
apply
due to
mining activities, agriculture and illegal hunting lead to some species are
endangered or even extinct. Wrong verb form
being
Thus
, advocating the
Correct article usage
apply
animals
conservation through funding and Change to a genitive case
animal's
animals'
voluntary
will assist biodiversity and sustainability, Replace the word
volunteering
as a
result
Add the comma(s)
,result
environment
will provide mankind basic
needs Change preposition
with basic
such
as food
more sustain in the long run.
On the other hand
, human population
problems are also
soaring over the years and become more complicated ,especially in the city. In addition
, developing and undeveloped countries had allocated their expense and time to solve problems in a human populations
Correct the article-noun agreement
a human population
human populations
such
as homeless, food
deficiency, education, and health care system, I would argue it is also
important because it will help their citizen well being and welfare. Although
human problems is
taken the main priority, we can not put aside the nature Change the verb form
are
life
Replace the word
living
environment
because conservating the environment
and wild animals
may impact human health by having good air quality and food
availability. Thus
, expenditure on the human population
and animals
must be balanced.
To summarize, raising more money and time to protect wild animal's
conservation, Change noun form
animals
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
also
provides numerous benefits for human population
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
such
as food
availability and a good environment
to live in, thereforetherefore, I strongly agree both benefits will be taken if we focus on protecting wildlife
Correct article usage
the wildlife
environment
.Submitted by conk.addict on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!