Some children spen hours every day on thier smartphones. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#children #spen #hours #thier #smartphones #development

Nowadays, technology plays an indispensable role in

the

Correct article usage

apply

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modern

life

due to

the fact that it has changed a lot of aspects of human

life

Addition

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In addition

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this

, the excessive use of digital gadgets, especially

smartphones

, among children could possibly have some adverse

bearings

Fix the agreement mistake

bearing

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. It is undeniable that

the

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apply

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technological development makes human daily

life

much more convenient than ever before.

To begin

with, kids could easily entertain themselves with

Internet

Correct article usage

the Internet

show examples

, which contains an enormous amount of music videos and video games, by only searching and clicking on their

smartphones

Secondly

, technology is really helpful to students for their self-study, especially

Change preposition

during

show examples

the

pademic

Correct your spelling

pandemic

epidemic

. It is more convenient and useful for pupils to learn things and

revising

Wrong verb form

revise

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knowledge, through educational websites and videos on Youtube

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than participate in offline classes.

On the other hand

, the overuse of

smartphones

could take a toll on

childrens

Correct your spelling

children

children's

for several reasons.

Firstly

, spending a huge amount of time on smart devices may lead to

the

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sedentary lifestyle among kids, which could be attributed to the reason that teenagers are intrigued by a variety of interesting things on the Internet.

Therefore

, they may gradually become

disintersted

Correct your spelling

disinterested

in outside activities or physical activities.

Last

but not least, excessive

smartphones

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smartphone

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use

associated

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is associated

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with higher levels of stress, anxiety, and depression.

For instance

teenagers

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teenagers'

teenager's

show examples

consant

Correct your spelling

constant

exposure

with

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show examples

social media and online content could contribute to the feeling of inadequacy, fear of missing out, and unhealthy social comparisons. In conclusion,

while

smartphones

have lots of constructive effects on human

life

, I firmly believe that

the

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apply

show examples

unrestrained phone usage could possibly do more harm than good.

Submitted by trangch705 on Wed May 17 2023

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

266 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Some children spen hours every day on thier smartphones. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

In some countries young people have little leisure time and are under a lot of pressure to work hard in studies. causes amd solutions?

Some people say that economic development is necessary to reduce the poverty in the world. Others say that economic growth should be stopped immediately lo stop damaging the environment. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or negative development

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?