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Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays, families are not as close as they used to be. What do you think are the cause of this and what can be done to make a family closre?

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In the cutting-edge era, family members do not create excellent bonds as compared to past times
this
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 essay intends to explicate some of the reasons and solutions to alleviate them and my viewpoints will be highlighted in the subsequent paragraphs. To commence with, there are multifarious reasons why families are not closer
rather
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than in the ancient period. The first and foremost reason for a community's name and fame in society.
In other words
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, in
this
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 competitive era, the crowd can earn a name and fame in the community through their hard work which is why they cannot spend quality time with their loved ones. Because of
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, their relationships are getting weaker day by day with their family members because of their professional success
for example
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 60% of the invisible can focus on their achievements going to
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 they can spend hours with family members
therefore
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 the multitude of bonding is very weak with their folk as compared past.
On the other hand
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, there are a myriad of ways to tackle
this
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 problem in society. The predominant one is that people should properly manage their time. What I mean to say is that if the masses manage their moment and they will spend time with
familyshowsws
Correct your spelling
family
,
then
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 they can make strong relationships with their loved ones.
For instance
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, a recent survey conducted by Oxford University in 2020. 50% of individuals could balance their professional and personal life and people live a happy life with their group.
To conclude
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,
although
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 there are several reasons why the publicist is not close to their family
such
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 as to earn a name and fame and set up their career
yet
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they will balance their professional and personal life
as well as
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 participate in societal events.

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task response
Ensure that the response directly addresses all parts of the task and demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic. Focus on providing a clear and developed response to the question throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Organize ideas logically and coherently. Use appropriate cohesive devices, such as transition words and pronouns, to connect ideas within and between sentences.
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