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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

All over the world, societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem affects both children and adults. What are the reasons for this rise in obesity? How could it be tackled?

#world #societies #obesity #children #adults #rise
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A generation ago, obesity grew at an astonishing rate, and directly affected
people
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 both young and mature. It can’t be denied that it will be a new crucial issue which could be solved quickly.
This
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 essay will describe the reasons for
this
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 and propose some solutions. One of the main causes of the
problem
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 is that
people
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 are lulled by the convenience provided by the advancement of technology. Everyone may prefer to do modern activities that spend their time only online life
such
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 as scrolling social media, playing online games, and others. It could be said that these activities contribute to decreasing in their body to keep healthy and it will be caused by
people
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 who overlook training themselves in sports activities. The solution is for the government to produce regulation that creates an instrument of limitation to use the of advanced technology in a day and establish a park with fitness facilities a lot with free, which would attract more
people
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 easily doing work-out. Another
problem
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 is that
people
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 have terrible diet habits that they are unaware of what kind of substances are in their own food or beverage. Junk food and soft drink,
for example
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, are the favourite product
that is
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 consumed by modern
people
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 and contain lots of sugar.
Furthermore
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, consuming excess sugar is the main
problem
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 which makes obesity grow significantly. To tackle
this
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problem
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,
people
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 should consider their diet to become healthier than before and train to make new habits like exercise or working out.
To sum up
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, obesity is becoming an essential issue in the modern era that should be overcome effectively and efficiently.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Obesity
  • Overweight
  • Epidemic
  • Sedentary
  • Processed food
  • Fast food
  • Nutritional education
  • Awareness
  • Stress
  • Emotional eating
  • Genetic factors
  • Access
  • Healthy food options
  • Marketing
  • Urbanization
  • Lifestyles
What to do next:
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