The chart and graph below give information about participants who have entered the Olympics since it began. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting on the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The chart and graph below give information about participants who have entered

the Olympics since it began.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting on the main features,

and make comparisons where relevant
The
chart
provides information about the
number
of
men
participants
in the
Olympics
compared to
women
in four
years
. Meanwhile, the line
chart
illustrates the holistic
numbers
of
participants
in the same period of time.
Overall
,
men
participating in the
Olympics
are notably higher than
women
.
Furthermore
, the
number
of players kept an increasing trend throughout the
years
. Regarding the data in the
chart
, in the first two
years
1924 and 1952,
men
participants
occupied most of the positions in the
Olympics
, with 3000 and above 4000 in the two
years
, respectively. In 1984,
significantly
Correct article usage
a significantly
show examples
growing
number
of
women
participants
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
shown, reaching about 1500,
while
were higher by three folds. In the
last
year, a considerable
number
of participation by
men
and
women
numbers
were pretty clear reaching 6000 for
men
and about 5000 for
women
. Moving to the line graph, the participation rates kept a stable growth between 1924 and 1984 beginning
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
about 3000
participants
to 6000. During the end of the period, the
numbers
rose drastically to
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
10000 participations in 2012. In short, the first
chart
showed that
men
participated in the
Olympics
more than
women
, yet their
numbers
became closer by 2012. The
overall
number
of
participants
followed a gradually increasing trend in the first three
years
with a sudden growth by 2012.
Submitted by tnteeroo on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, number, men, participants, olympics, women, years, numbers with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 6 times.
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 4 times.
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