In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing . Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Suburban residents migration to cities is a widespread phenomenon.
This
Linking Words
reduction in the rural populace comes with its fair share of advantages and downturns;
however
Linking Words
, I am of the opinion that its negative impacts outweigh the benefits. Moving to urban
areas
Use synonyms
is believed to be beneficial not only to
individuals
Use synonyms
but
also
Linking Words
to wildlife. Rural
areas
Use synonyms
usually do not have sufficient amenities needed for certain professions; thereby, moving to urban
areas
Use synonyms
might open doors to uncharted territories by venturing into which
individuals
Use synonyms
will be able to unleash their potential.
Moreover
Linking Words
, human beings have extended their living
areas
Use synonyms
at the expense of destroying floras' and faunas' habitats.
This
Linking Words
practice is usually uncontrolled in the countryside, where people are not educated enough to consider the long-term effects of their actions.
Therefore
Linking Words
, poaching, ungovernable fishing, and wilful tree chopping represent a concerning issue that needs to be addressed. With the displacement of suburban residents, wildlife gets a chance to rejuvenate and lower the extinction rates. Meanwhile, migrated
individuals
Use synonyms
get a chance to cherish their hometown reservoirs by receiving a thorough education on pressing matters and learning the importance of controlled usage of natural resources.
However
Linking Words
, the exodus from lands to cities can bring about damaging consequences both for
individuals
Use synonyms
and society at large. People aim to migrate in order to ameliorate their lives;
however
Linking Words
, hopes for a better life are often dashed as overpopulation puts an enormous strain on the infrastructure of cities and their ability to provide basic needs. Unable to provide decent housing, inadequate education for one's children, and low quality of life in shanty towns can trigger the high mental pressure already imposed by the alienated, frantic pace of life.
This
Linking Words
lack of serenity and unaccustomedness can cause irreparable repercussions,
such
Linking Words
as chronic anxiety and depression.
In addition
Linking Words
, Healthy,
nutrious
Correct your spelling
nutritious
food consumption is an integral
factoral
Correct your spelling
factor
factorial
of
overall
Linking Words
well-being. As farmers migrate, the sheer number of workers on land will decline, and harvests and domestic animal breedings will fall
accordingly
Linking Words
.
This
Linking Words
shortage in food provision can cause famine across the country
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and hinders
citizens
Change noun form
citizens'
citizen's
show examples
well-beings
Correct your spelling
well-being
show examples
. In conclusion, the allure of urbanisation pales in the face of food shortages and mental health issues.
Submitted by ghazalmoosavi79 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

relevant specific examples
Try to provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
supported main points
Ensure all your main points are sufficiently supported with evidence or examples.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly presents the topic and your opinion is well-stated.
logical structure
Your essay flows well with logical paragraphs, making it easy to follow your arguments.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-to-urban migration
  • population shift
  • positive impact
  • negative impact
  • urbanization
  • job opportunities
  • access to education
  • access to healthcare
  • urban infrastructure
  • rural traditions
  • cultural heritage
What to do next:
Look at other essays: