Nowadays a growing number of boys and girls within normal weight ranges have an intense fear of gaining weight and therefore get anorexia. Why do you think a lot of teenagers have a strong desire to be skinny? What can be done to prevent this eating disorder?

#boys #girls #weight #ranges #fear #anorexia #teenagers #desire #disorder

resent

Correct your spelling

recent

show examples

years , teenagers of normal

weight

have

fear

Correct article usage

a fear

show examples

of increasing

weight

, which leads to

get

Change the verb form

getting

show examples

anorexia. In

this

essay I will discuss why boys and girls have a strong desire to be slim and fit

then

I will move in to give some

solution

Fix the agreement mistake

solutions

show examples

this

situation . social media is the key to the result of tending to be thin .

People

want to catch on

everyone

Change noun form

everyone's

show examples

eyes and follow the latest fashion trend .

Stars

Correct article usage

The stars

show examples

on the screen are so skinny and elegant .

Beside

Replace the word

Besides

show examples

, there are lots of clothes

are

Correct pronoun usage

that are

show examples

suitable for thinner

people

For instance

, my friend always

complain

Change the verb form

complains

show examples

to me that she’s so fat . I know she wants to be the same as her celebrity .

Therefore

I believe that the issue is influenced by the entertainment industry. Most important of all, correcting the value is the first step should

people

do . humans have to know that beauty isn’t only about appearance ,but

also

a health condition . If you don’t have a healthy body, you would not have a chance to enjoy it .

Instead

of losing

weight

, having a

balance

Change the verb form

balanced

show examples

diet and regular exercise is more

benefits

Replace the word

beneficial

show examples

. It will improve your body , and make you have an optimistic lifestyle.

Additionally

Add a comma

,Additionally

show examples

parents have to teach their children the importance of health rather than focus on

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

appearance. In conclusion, the main factor to cause

people

struggling

Change the verb form

to struggle

show examples

with their

weight

trend

Add an article

the trend

a trend

show examples

entertainments

Fix the agreement mistake

entertainment

show examples

However

Add a comma

,However

show examples

correcting the value and educate by their children will solve

this

problem

Submitted by maryamabugela on Sun May 21 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

260 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays a growing number of boys and girls within normal weight ranges have an intense fear of gaining weight and therefore get anorexia. Why do you think a lot of teenagers have a strong desire to be skinny? What can be done to prevent this eating disorder?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

.Some people argue that the fittest and strongest individuals and teams can achieve the greatest success in sports. But other people think that success is much related to mental attitude. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people think that the media (newspapers) have the right to publish details of people,s private life while others think it should be controlled. Discuss both views.

Computer today can quickly and accurately languages . therefore, it is a save the time . To what extent do you agree or not ?

Some people believe that children of all ages should have extra responsibilities (for example, helping at home or at work). Others believe that, outside of school, children should be free to enjoy their lives. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.