the audience of the male sports are more than the female sports what are the causes is it positive or a negative development.

In today's world, both genders are equally active in every field whether it is a job or sports but, unfortunately, at some instant, society favours more
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
men's sports rather than women's. I think
people
enjoy more aggression in men during the
games
and other
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
may
people
dominate
girls
and it is a negative development because
girls
are not getting proper recognition even after giving their full efforts.
Firstly
, everyone loves the
games
when it has more action and enthusiasm during play because folks get entertained a lot with them.
Moreover
, the insane act of the player
while
playing boosts the heat of the game and the audience finds more fun in it.
For example
, an IPL is the most popular tournament in India, and everyone supports their favourite team whether their team perform well or not but their love makes the makes more crucial.
Secondly
,
people
always
thinks
Change the verb form
think
show examples
girls
are only for household
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
if any girl
try
Change the verb form
tries
show examples
to do
any thing
Correct your spelling
anything
show examples
like
job
Correct article usage
a job
show examples
and
Correct word choice
or
show examples
sport that male
dominate
Replace the word
dominant
show examples
society does not allow her to show her capabilities
therefore
, even try so hard in
games
they don't get proper recognition of their work.
For instance
, my friend who belongs to a middle-class family doesn't allow to play any game because of their parent's narrow-minded thinking even though she is very talented and skilful in
games
. In conclusion,
although
people
are changing with time, they give equal attention to both
gender
Change to a plural noun
genders
show examples
as compared to previous times, some places
also
needalso
Correct your spelling
need also
need proper awareness where
girls
are
also
facing these problems even
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
these days as well.
Submitted by grewalpt1249 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender disparity
  • fan base
  • media representation
  • sponsorship deals
  • commercialization
  • stereotypes
  • athletic prowess
  • marketing strategies
  • visibility
  • cultural norms
  • gender inequality
  • grassroots initiatives
  • equal representation
  • institutional bias
  • public interest
What to do next:
Look at other essays: