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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart compares the way in which water passes from ocean to air to land during the natural process known as the water cycle.

The chart compares the way in which water passes from ocean to air to land during the natural process known as the water cycle.
The chart compares the way in which
water
Use synonyms
 passes from ocean to air to land during the natural process known as the
water
Use synonyms
 cycle.
Overall
Linking Words
, there are three main stages given on the diagram. Ocean
water
Use synonyms
 evaporates, falls as rain, and eventually runs back into the
oceans
Use synonyms
 again. Beginning at the evaporation stage, we can see that 80% of
water
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vapor
Change the spelling
vapour
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 in the air comes from the
oceans
Use synonyms
. Sunlight causes
water
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 to evaporate and
water
Use synonyms
vapor
Change the spelling
vapour
show examples
 forms clouds.
Subsequently
Linking Words
,
labeled
Change the spelling
labelled
show examples
 precipitation on the diagram,
water
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 falls as rain or snow. The process ends when in the cycle, rainwater may take various paths. Some of it may fall into lakes or return to the
oceans
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 via surface runoff.
Otherwise
Linking Words
, rainwater may filter through the ground, reaching the impervious layer of the earth.
Salt
Correct your spelling
Saltwater
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water
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 intrusion is shown to take place just before groundwater passes into the
oceans
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 to complete the cycle.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, oceans with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "compares" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "diagram" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "falls" was used 3 times.
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