Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development? Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is argued that some nation tends to provide
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
state-of-the-art of
Use synonyms
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
facilities
Use synonyms
to support talented athletes and achieve international sports rather than serve it
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
general. I personally think
this
Linking Words
is a negative approach
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
since
Use synonyms
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
facility
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
better served in public and
this
Linking Words
essay will discuss more
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
topic. Most of the government currently pay attention more
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
Use synonyms
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
facilities
Use synonyms
in order to obtain certification to
held
Wrong verb form
hold
show examples
sports
event
Fix the agreement mistake
events
show examples
. They
also
Linking Words
provide better
Use synonyms
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
facilities
Use synonyms
and only belong
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
top athletes, which ordinary
people
Use synonyms
does
Change the verb form
do
show examples
not operate the same property.
For Instance
Linking Words
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
in my country have been build a new sports facility which
once
Add a missing verb
was once
show examples
used for
held
Change the form of the verb
holding
show examples
an Olympiad
afterwards
Correct word choice
but afterwards
show examples
never been
operate
Change the form of the verb
operated
show examples
. When
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
in that area want to use the facility,
administrative
Correct article usage
the administrative
show examples
officer not allowing them to
use
Correct pronoun usage
ituse
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
is how the regulation can create gaps among the citizen who have
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
same right to be treated as a citizen and
this
Linking Words
is why I did not accord to
this
Linking Words
notion.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, when the
facilities
Use synonyms
are served for the public, it will bring
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
many advantages for the
people
Use synonyms
it self
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
and
also
Linking Words
the nation.
For instance
Linking Words
; from the health factors it can create
sense
Add an article
a sense
show examples
of
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
lifestyle
whereas
Linking Words
everyone not doing
sport
Use synonyms
as a hobby;
however
Linking Words
, it will bring
people
Use synonyms
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
a healthy life. More ever, it
also
Linking Words
could create more talented young
people
Use synonyms
for the Nation.
To conclude
Linking Words
, government suppose to be more neutral in
provide
Change the verb form
providing
show examples
public
facilities
Use synonyms
without
creates
Wrong verb form
creating
show examples
a gap between their societies.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • specialised facilities
  • train top athletes
  • international sports
  • boost
  • reputation
  • attract
  • sporting events
  • access
  • general public
  • inequality
  • opportunities
  • overemphasis
  • elite sports
  • neglect
  • grassroots development
What to do next:
Look at other essays: