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Writing Samples
Band 7

■The chart below give information on the percentage of British people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. ■Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

■The chart below give information on the percentage of British people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. ■Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant
#■the #information #percentage #british #people #money #charity #age #range #years #■summarise #features #comparisons
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The bar chart illustrates, during the
period
Use synonyms
 between 1990 and 2010, the proportion of the amount given to
charity
Use synonyms
 by British citizens.
Overall
Linking Words
, the Blue bar represents the
period
Use synonyms
 from 1990 and the orange colour bar is 2010.
According to
Linking Words
 the graph,
it is clear that
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 middle
age
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 provided more amount in the
period
Use synonyms
 1990,
while
Linking Words
 youngsters gave
money
Use synonyms
 to
charity
Use synonyms
 is less in the
year
Use synonyms
 2010.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, starts with the
age
Use synonyms
 range 18-25, both the
year
Use synonyms
 only a few
people
Use synonyms
 contribute amount to the
charity
Use synonyms
.
That is
Linking Words
 17% in 1990 and 6% in 2010.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in 1990 only 31% of
people
Use synonyms
, which are between the
age
Use synonyms
 of 26-35, gives
money
Use synonyms
 to welfare and
also
Linking Words
 near to 25% of individuals in 2010. In the beginning
period
Use synonyms
, in the
age
Use synonyms
 range of 36-50, 44% of humans paid
money
Use synonyms
 to
charity
Use synonyms
.
As well as
Linking Words
 in 2010, significantly it went down and reach 35%.
However
Linking Words
, In the old
age
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 51-65, In the
year
Use synonyms
 1990, 35% of
people
Use synonyms
 contribute
money
Use synonyms
 to
charity
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.
Whereas
Linking Words
 in 2010, it increased to 4% which is 39%.
Last
Linking Words
 but not least,
those
Change preposition
for those
show examples
 above 65
age
Use synonyms
, residents spend
money
Use synonyms
 on
charity
Use synonyms
 about 34% in the
year
Use synonyms
 1990 and 35% in 2010.
Submitted by anjualex444 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "that is".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words period, charity, age, people, money, year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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