Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugars which causes many health problems. Sugar products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

It is becomingly increasing common that many manufactured goods for eating and drinking contain too much
sugar
and cause
health
problems for
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
. Some
supporter
Fix the agreement mistake
supporters
show examples
argue that the government should increase the tax
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
sugar
to encourage
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
to
useless
Correct your spelling
use less
show examples
sugar
. From my
perspective
Add a comma
,perspective
show examples
while
this
approach is practice, there are other methods better than it . Admittedly, proponents of
this
approach argue it
it
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
effective to reduce the quantity of
sugar
using
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
. the main
rean
Correct your spelling
reason
is that if government lead the higher
price
of
sugar
,
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apply
show examples
when customers want to buy them , they would find that the products are more expensive. It
it
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
not worth
to buy
Change the verb form
buying
show examples
these goods . So, People’s life could be healthier because they eat less sweets and more
health
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healthy
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foods and drinks.
However
,
although
the method is useful , it is
also
unfair and has a negative impact on the market. For some people especially
to
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in
show examples
the community who only use
the
Correct article usage
apply
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sugar
in a
limite
Correct your spelling
limited
quantity, it is
unjusticifible
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unjustifiable
for them to spend more money on daily
us
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use
show examples
?
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.
show examples
products.
In addition
, there are too many products using the
sugar
. If the
price
of
sugar
rise
Fix the agreement mistake
rises
show examples
, these
goods’s
Remove the s
goods’
show examples
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
would rise too.
Public’s
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The public’s
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life
expencies
Correct your spelling
expenses
would be much higher than before. So
i
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I
show examples
suggest
to set
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setting
show examples
a rule for the
productive
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production
show examples
company about how
many
Correct quantifier usage
much
show examples
sugar
Change to a plural noun
sugars
show examples
they are allowed to use . The product
contain
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contains
show examples
less
sugar
could
Correct word choice
and could
show examples
let
coustomers
Correct your spelling
customers
become more healthy.
Furthermore
, the government could start
health
class
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classes
show examples
to teach students to know what
kind
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kinds
show examples
of food
are
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is
show examples
suitable and
health
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healthy
show examples
for them,
therefore
, they would eat less
sugar
to adapt
obesity
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to obesity
show examples
and other
health
problems. In conclusion, It’s true that
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
show examples
sugar’s
Change noun form
sugar
show examples
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
can
limite
Correct your spelling
limit
people’s cost
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
sugar
., but it is unjustified for a part of people and the markets. Some other ways like teaching
health
tips and limiting
sugar
using
Replace the word
use
show examples
of
Change preposition
by
show examples
companies are more useful e and fair.
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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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