IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people believe that it is a good idea that people older people continue to work if it is possible for them to do . Do you agree or disagree ?

#people #idea #work
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Currently, the problem of some
people
prefer
Change the verb form
prefers
show examples
 older
people
 they can go
work
 until when they can not do it anymore .
For
Change preposition
Me
show examples
me
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
, I will agree with that if they can
flexible
Add a missing verb
be flexible
show examples
Change preposition
with everthing
show examples
everthing
Correct your spelling
everything
. First , they need to know about between
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
money and health , some
people
thye
Correct your spelling
they
 want to earn a lot of money and don'
t
 care about their health I'm not
support
Correct article usage
a support
show examples
 for
kind
Correct article usage
a kind
show examples
 of person like that when they
old
Add a missing verb
are old
show examples
 but still want to
work
. Everyone can
work
 until when they feel can not do anymore but don'
t
 do something like make yourself feel bad . Because
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
 to
work
 that's way can make old
people
 don'
t
 feel alone
also
 and they can make
friend
Fix the agreement mistake
friends
show examples
,
communicate
Correct word choice
and communicate
show examples
 with
people
 same the age . They can understand each other and can share something in
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 life with someone.
Addition
Change preposition
In addition
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, I recommend for older
people
 go
work
Change preposition
to work
show examples
 because
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 saw so many old
people
 stay at home too long and don'
t
 have
people
 to talk they get
depression
Replace the word
depressed
show examples
 and feel
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
too bad . Avoid older
work
 too much so I think the companies if want to
hiring
Change the verb
hire
show examples
some one
Correct your spelling
someone
show examples
 need to check their body heath first because
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 don'
t
 want to like some
people
 their health is not good but
stil
Correct your spelling
still
 want to earn money.
Summary
Change preposition
In summary
show examples
, I recommend for old
people
 go to
work
 but not
work
to
Replace the word
too
show examples
 hard and need to
becareful
Correct your spelling
be careful
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 them self.
Submitted by ng.dquinn56 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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