IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Working long hours causes a great deal of stress and can be very bad for the health. The government must find a way to reduce this type of stress. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#hours #stress #health #government #type
Due to
 the increase in inflation,folks are working around the clock to meet the basic needs of life.Since Overworking is one of the main reasons for stress and can have adverse effects on health;
therefore
, the government must find some ways to alleviate the production burden.I agree with the statement. With health concerns,
this
 approach can lead to indigestion.At business places, employees get smaller breaks to relax and eat.
In addition
 to it,if they are spending more of their day at the office,
then
 they do not get proper time to make nutritious food at home.
As a result
,they give preference to junk food.It is reported that junk food is the main reason for obesity as it contains high levels of unhealthy fats.
Apart from
this
,working extra hours can cause tiredness which leads to low productivity at tasks.Having low-performance esteem employees will do less effort in more time. Making ways to tackle job stress, the government can lower the labour cost.Relax mind can do much work within a short period of time as compared to a depressed brain.
Hence
 production productivity will rise with
this
 approach.
To conclude
,taking some simple steps by the government can be a proven blessing for a society which might bring various benefits
such
 as much task efficiency and healthy workers so I think they must do something to alleviate stress.
Submitted by aroraanmol890 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!