Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

#food #drink #products #levels #sugar #health #people

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There are several

products

Use synonyms

which contain a significant amount of added

sugar

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such

Linking Words

as cola or some meals. It is able to chief cause of some diseases in

this

Linking Words

era.

Furthermore

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, there are those who subscribe to

this

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the best way to protect humans from

this

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issue is to

increaseed

Correct your spelling

increased

increase

expenditure on

sugar

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products

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. I personally agree with that idea because it is highly beneficial for

rising

Correct your spelling

raising

show examples

healthy

Correct article usage

a healthy

show examples

body.

Firstly

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, many commentators justifiably argue that nowadays the consumption of added

sugar

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grows rapidly

hence

Linking Words

, the statistics of some diseases go up significantly. Some illes

such

Linking Words

as being overweight are one of the results of overuse of added

sugar

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

phenomenon creates huge problems for most government functions

due to

Linking Words

the enormous number of people who need to stay at the hospital to solve their problems.

Consequently

Linking Words

, the government are able to increase their budget with the upward tax on

sugar

Use synonyms

products

Use synonyms

and

then

Linking Words

, they can update the qualities and amenities of hospitals with revenue of tax.

Secondly

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, the

last

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statistics show us, most folks are willing to use

sugar

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products

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because the price of that in comparison to other health crops is cheaper so most of mankind prefers to consume added

sugar

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crops

instead

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of health

products

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for example

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: the price of cake in Canada is about 5$

while

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the average fee for fruit in that country is about 10$ so most citizens encourage to use unhealthy feeds. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

there are some individuals who have the opposite view, I think the merits of

increase

Wrong verb form

increasing

show examples

the price of

sugar

Use synonyms

products

Use synonyms

are noticeable

due to

Linking Words

the decline in health problems and the use of

sugar

Use synonyms

products

Use synonyms

Submitted by amirhsina on Sat May 27 2023

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

275 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

health problems
manufactured food and drink products
sugary products
excessive sugar consumption
discourage
promote
healthier choices
reduce
increased taxes
fund
health education
prevention programs

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Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

The most important aim of science should be improve people's live. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

More and more students are taking a year off between finishing high school and going to university. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Write a 250-word essay for the topic: Some people think that advertisements aimed at children should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The number of cars has increased significantly in major cities. What problems does this cause and what are some solutions to these problems?

Topic: the rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. Do the advantages of using social media for communication outweigh the disadvantages?