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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people suy that the government should ensure that people lead a healthy life, while others believe that individuals should have their own choices. Discuss both wiens and give your opinion.

#people #suy #government #life #individuals #choices #wiens
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The
Correct article usage
A
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 healthy
lifestyle
Use synonyms
 is important because it has a direct bearing on our dignity and well-being.
Although
Linking Words
 many
people
Use synonyms
 regard
lifestyle
Use synonyms
 choices as a personal matter, do not think
people
Use synonyms
 are likely to adopt a healthy
lifestyle
Use synonyms
 unless the
government
Use synonyms
 intervenes. If
people
Use synonyms
 decide how to live their lives, they will possibly be happier. They choose to develop and maintain healthy habits because they believe these habits can bring enjoyment to their lives.
For example
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
 may pay attention to fruit and vegetables in their diets, which can help them keep fit and increase their confidence in
work
Correct pronoun usage
their work
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 and social lives. They will live under enormous pressure
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 if they are obsessed with how to follow the
government
Use synonyms
's
lifestyle
Use synonyms
guideline
Fix the agreement mistake
guidelines
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is important for the
government
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 to tighten
regulation
Fix the agreement mistake
regulations
show examples
 on some behaviours, especially those which have been proven to be damaging to
health
Use synonyms
. There are many
people
Use synonyms
 who lack self-discipline.
For example
Linking Words
, they smoke,
although
Linking Words
 it is common knowledge that smoking endangers their
health
Use synonyms
. The consequence is that their habit is not only harmful to their
health
Use synonyms
 but
also
Linking Words
 to those living around them. In my view, the
government
Use synonyms
 should be responsible for educating the public about what to do and offering guidance. Many
people
Use synonyms
 are not well-informed about how damaging their ways of life can be. Many
people
Use synonyms
 today take on desk jobs, but they do not realise that
this
Linking Words
 sedentary
lifestyle
Use synonyms
 can affect their
health
Use synonyms
 adversely and reduce life expectancy. Many
people
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 eat fast food to save time, but they are not aware that
this
Linking Words
 kind of fattening food can cause
health
Use synonyms
 problems. Governments should launch awareness campaigns or introduce laws,
for example
Linking Words
, requiring all fast food restaurants to put nutritional content on packaging, to ensure that
people
Use synonyms
 are conscious of the impact of their dietary habits on
health
Use synonyms
.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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