In many countries, senior positions have higher salaries compared to those of young workers of the same company. Some people think this isn’t justified. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Corporations in several states give higher salaries to their elder
workers
than junior employers. Some citizens think
this
is not fair. I disagree with the second opinion, and
this
essay will discuss it
further
.
To begin
with, some people said that salaries in the
company
must be fair because
juniors
have the same right as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
seniors.
However
,
this
opinion is flawed. The main reason for
this
is that senior
workers
served longer than the
juniors
. The longer the
workers
serve the
company
, the more profits the companies get.
As a result
, once a year the employers give bonuses to the
workers
who have been working for a longer period of time.
In addition
, there are two advantages to the gap in
salary
among
workers
. First of all, it may boost the enthusiasm of the
juniors
to work harder. To illustrate, should the
juniors
know their seniors get paid more, they tend to give better performance to the
company
to get a high
salary
. Second of all, loyalty from young
workers
might increase.
For example
, Since
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
seniors get a higher
salary
by working for a long time period,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
juniors
may stay in the workplace to raise their
salary
.
Hence
, by gaining the motivation and the loyalty of the
workers
, the corporations might increase their earnings.
To conclude
, I disagree that companies should justify
workers
Change noun form
workers'
worker's
show examples
salaries.
Due to
the longer work experience of senior employees, they have better skills than the
juniors
and senior
workers
contribute to the
company
profits.
Furthermore
, regarding the higher
salary
of senior
workers
, there are two benefits, boosting
juniors
' spirit and loyalty.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: