IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

as well as making money, businesses have also social responsibility, to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#money #businesses #responsibility
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Today's enterprises are facing calls for them to take on social responsibilities,
Although
Linking Words
 I agree that making money is the top priority for any business, I suppose that companies should impose appropriate strategies to help enhance the communities in which they operate. organizational objectives have constantly centred on profit maximization. it is true that money strategies are indispensable for companies to acquire financial success. if the business and employees do not strive to promote their revenues, they will be not able to compete with their rivals in the job market, limiting their abilities to create more job opportunities, and they will hardly survive if they do not lay a solid financial foundation.
In addition
Linking Words
, if the enterprises do not profitable they will not incentive to invest in social campaigns. In spite of
this
Linking Words
, cooperation should be held accountable for addressing social needs rather than focusing on economic growth. Responsibility to the community for taking on problems on a global scale, climate change, and a lack of available resources are among the most pressing issue in modern society.
For example
Linking Words
, the multinational cooperation Nestle through various charity campaigns, they have provided over 700,000 gifts to the poor in Vietnam in March 2020,
this
Linking Words
 is an effort to raise the living standard of local residents, which partly helps alleviate challenges and lend assistance to the poor in tough periods of time. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 making a profit should be the primary goal of the business, I suppose that they should spend appropriate money on pressing issues of society.
Submitted by nguyenhoanganh64195123 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: