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Writing Samples
Band 5

The graph shows visits to and from the UK from 1979 to 1999. The bar chart shows the most popular countries visited by UK residents un 1999.

The graph shows visits to and from the UK from 1979 to 1999. The bar chart shows the most popular countries visited by UK residents un 1999.
The line chart illustrates the
rate
Use synonyms
 of trips from and to the
UK
Use synonyms
 between 1979 and 1899. The bar graph,
whereas
Linking Words
 demonstrates the states that were the most common
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
visit
Fix the agreement mistake
visits
show examples
amoung
Correct your spelling
among
UK
Use synonyms
 citizens in 1999.
Overall
Linking Words
, the main trend in
first
Change the article
the first
show examples
 graph shows the
rate
Use synonyms
 of
UK
Use synonyms
 residents who
prefered
Correct your spelling
preferred
travelling
Change the verb form
to travel
show examples
 abroad rapidly Increased since 1979 and reached
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 peak
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period. The number of
tourist
Change to a plural noun
tourists
show examples
 who went
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
UK
Use synonyms
 had
similar
Add an article
a similar
show examples
 pattern,
however
Linking Words
, rose slightly during
whole
Add an article
the whole
show examples
 period and reached the maximum indication only
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 1999. The bar diagram demonstrates that the lowest parts of
UK
Use synonyms
 visitors
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 accounted
by
Change preposition
for
show examples
 people from
turkey
Correct your spelling
Turkey
show examples
,
whereas
Linking Words
 the most significant part consisted
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
 from France. Obviously,
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
travelling abroad among
UK
Use synonyms
 residents was not so popular in 1979, the number of them was
abone
Correct your spelling
about
 10
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
,
however
Linking Words
, it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
slowly grew by approximately 10 million
to
Change preposition
by
show examples
 1984,
then
Linking Words
 the
rate
Use synonyms
 of visits abroad by
UK
Use synonyms
 citizens increased again and estimated the peak in more than half in
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
1999.
Whereas
Linking Words
, the frequency of visits to the
UK
Use synonyms
 by overseas residents consisted 10
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 in 1979 and slowly rose to 20
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 in 1999,
then
Linking Words
, it
continued
Add the particle
tocontinued
show examples
 grow and reached the maximum number
about
Change preposition
of about
show examples
 28
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
to
Change preposition
by
show examples
 the finish of the period.
Most
Add an article
The most
show examples
 common tendency to visit
Use synonyms
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 in 1999 was in France where the
rate
Use synonyms
 of tourists was about 10
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
rate
Correct article usage
the rate
show examples
 of visitors from Turkey was the lowest, less
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 five million
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Turkish people travelled to
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom in 1999. It is quite less than

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, whereas".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words rate, uk, millions with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slowly" was used 2 times.
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