IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Advances in technology and automation have reduced the need of manual labour. Therefore, working hours should be reduced. To what extent do you agree? Agree

In
this
Linking Words
 era,
development
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 in
technology
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 and automation have declined the need
of
Change preposition
for
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employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
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 or
worker
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workers
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.
Therefore
Linking Words
, in
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will describe
about
Remove the preposition
apply
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my opinion. A popular belief is that
,
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apply
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 having
technology
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 and automation has been considered as an essential thing for human activities
such
Linking Words
 as
increase
Wrong verb form
increasing
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 productivity and
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
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 faster.
In addition
Linking Words
 to that, well-qualified people who consider
technology
Use synonyms
development
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 could gain
a
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apply
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plenty of options rather than
use
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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manual labour, because individuals can follow the modern era to
use
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 cutting-edge technologies as important elements to get
the
Correct article usage
apply
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high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
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of
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apply
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product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
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 and
convenience
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convenient
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 environment at work. Even though directing
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use
Add an article
the use
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 of
technology
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 has difficulties and failures to manage, organize, or utilize,
technology
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 has a huge opportunity to obtain a better result.
For example
Linking Words
, if citizens focus on
technology
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 growth to attract
the
Correct article usage
apply
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productivity, they will earn more
revenues
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revenue
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 and
incomes
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income
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.
As a result
Linking Words
, focusing on
technology
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 could incline the amount of good-quality
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
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 not only for today but
aslo
Correct your spelling
also
 for
coming
Correct article usage
the coming
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 days.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are several issues or problems, to develop or evolve the
technology
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 to become crucial and famous in society’s view by having high cost and unemployment. First thing
first,
Linking Words
having terrible
obstacle
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obstacles
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 in
technology
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 research could obtain and increase
cost
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the cost
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 of
development
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, because several inhabitants have
wish
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wished
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 and hope about the easiness of financing.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
having
Unnecessary verb
apply
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unemployment could become negative impacts or consequences, because society will not agree, support, and advocate
the
Correct article usage
apply
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high
technology
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.
Although
Linking Words
Use synonyms
technology
Replace the word
technological
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 developments have an ideal opportunity to become potential incomes, these technologies and
automations
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automation
 could not be
implementative
Correct your spelling
implementation
 and acceptable, because
technology
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 can make people
loose
Replace the word
lose
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 their jobs.
For instance
Linking Words
, if several societies understand and comprehend
regarding
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apply
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the
technology
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 impact, they will appreciate the meaning of
Use synonyms
development
Replace the word
developing
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technology
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 to avoid feeling hesitant in society.
Therefore
Linking Words
, technologies have been assumed as good elements for
society’s
Unnecessary verb
society
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 to know and admit the
technology
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 opportunity
in
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apply
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some years ago until today’s era. In conclusion, in my opinion, I agree to
use
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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technology
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 and automation for developing
industry
Correct article usage
the industry
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, because it can make more
revenues
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revenue
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 and
incomes
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income
show examples
 from the effectiveness of
Use synonyms
technology
Add an article
the technology
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.

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