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Band 3

Scientists believe that the world is in danger due to environmental changes .Some people say that personal lifestyle should be made to reduce the damage to environment, while others think that the government should do something to help. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

#scientists #world #danger #changes #people #lifestyle #damage #environment #government
Scientist and
the
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apply
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people believe
believe
Remove the redundancy
apply
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that
the
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environmental
changes
is
Change the verb form
are
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 the biggest danger to
the
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apply
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society .In my opinion
Add a comma
,
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the combined effort of both the government and the people can
reduced
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reduce
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 the damage to the
environment
Due to
 the modernization and urbanisation which is happening around the world
make
Wrong verb form
making
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 some
changes
 in the
environment
 .The climatic conditions
has
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have
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 changed
due to
the
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apply
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environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
changes
 .The
overall
 temperature of the earth is increasing day by day .In the polar region the iceberg
are
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is
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 melting
due to
the
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environmental
changes
 .some should change
lifestyle
Correct pronoun usage
their lifestyle
show examples
 to reduce the damage to
the
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apply
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society .
By reducing
Change preposition
Reducing
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 the
gas
emissions
 in the vehicle can reduce the air pollution around us .Reducing the usage of crackers during the festival season..planting more
number of
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apply
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trees helps the reduction of damage
in
Change preposition
to
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 the
environment
 Government should control the
gas
 emission from the industrial sector. Carbon
emissions
 from the industries .increase the methanol content in the gasoline used in the vehicle
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 leads to the reduction of
gas
emissions
. Protect the ozone layers by reducing the
gas
emissions
 of the industry
From
Change preposition
In
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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conclusion both the government and
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 should combine to reduce the effects of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
gas
emissions
 from the industry
Submitted by arunramrvs on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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