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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Films and computer games which contain violence are very popular. Some people believe they have a negative effect on society and so should be banned. Other people, however, say they are just harmless and help people to relax. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#films #computer #games #violence #people #effect #society
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In the current age, It is affirmed by the majority of movie
critiques
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critics
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 that cruel and vicious shows, which have a wide reputation in our societies, deplorably and seriously affect our community’s citizens` mindset. (O) others deem that the more violence in media exists, the more pleasure it will fetch. From my perspective, I consent to the first opinion, and the essay will illustrate that in the upcoming paragraphs. On the one hand, owing to the widespread of drastic movies and games, felonies rates have increased exponentially in our countries.
In other words
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, as most juveniles and adolescents unconsciously
endeavored
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endeavoured
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 to apply what they watch, they perpetrate a plethora of wrongdoings without considering the ensuing aftermaths
from
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of
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 their actions. As an example, there was a rough crime, which took place in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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 in 2019, when a teenager killed his brother to apply the instructions of the prominent game at that time which was called ‘’ The Blue Whale``.
On the other hand
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, other onlookers opine that atrocities should exist in most films because they will bring considerable suspension and thrills.
In other words
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, not only, do these violent scenes render their audience excited and enthusiastic, but
also
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 they let them embrace illusion and fantasy as the plurality of these footages do not occur in reality,
For instance
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, most
thrilled
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thrilling
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 movies, which contain ghosts or people who have teratogenic manifestation, do not have any relationship with our factual life, or we seldom live that experiment. In conclusion,
after
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this
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 essay has provided the points mentioned above, it can be reiterated that some viewers or players believe that brutality should significantly
pervades
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pervade
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in
Change preposition
apply
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media platforms, I definitely oppose that belief because of its passive sequels on our societies.
Finally
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, it is predicted that criminalities proportions will dramatically upsurge
due to
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 the ubiquitous production of severe applications and films.
Submitted by musab.private92 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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