IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people argue that public should be allowed to have guns, while others do not agree. Discuss both the views and give you opinion.

#people #guns
Crime rates are rapidly increasing all over the world. Few individuals think that the populace should be permitted to keep guns,
while
 others do not agree with
this
 notion.
This
 essay will intend to analyze both views
along with
 my perspective. There are many reasons to authorities allowed the to public have revolver. The first and foremost reason is the poverty of nations. In some developed nations, people needed arms for
self-defense
Change the spelling
self-defence
show examples
 by
which
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 they can run their businesses without any issues from a thief.
For instance
, in the USA, Most of the time masses carry their pistol always with them because robbers are always ready to stealing ant things from public areas
such
 as Gas stations, Liquor stores, and many others.
As a result
, peoples are ready to save their life.
That is
 the reason the government of the USA has allowed everyone to own a gun.
However
, owning a gun
also
 has its disadvantages because criminals using in the wrong way for their meals or drinks. Few individuals use their arms in a hurry situation, they do not have enough time for thinking about what is he doing and after committing a crime they realize they did the biggest mistake in life.
For example
, in Bihar, 80% of people keep guns without a license or government registration, and they use
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 for short time anger issues. Many of them keep
rifle
Fix the agreement mistake
rifles
show examples
 to show their personality and create influence in the local area. In conclusion,
Although
 allowing arms to citizens is beneficial in some countries, its disadvantages are more so that I am
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
 in latter notion.
Submitted by arshpreetmalkana on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: