Some people say that schools should concentrate on teaching students academic subjets that will be useful for their future careers. Other people say that subjects such as music and sports are also necessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

#people #schools #students #subjets #future #careers #subjects #music #sports

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All people are successful in their field.

However

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, few asses believe that academic

subjects

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are only important in education for getting success in life and that

music

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sports

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are not beneficial for learners. I disagree with the given statement that scholars should only concentrate on academics rather than

sports

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. In

this

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essay, I intend to support my opinion with my argument.

That is

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not deniable that there are numerous reasons behind the tendency of academic classes.

Firstly

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, students who are interested in a field job, so they must push themselves to study to achieve higher scores. It is necessary to get high scores by which they get admission to top colleges so that it will be beneficial for a higher salary after graduation.

However

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, not everyone can get a good score in examinations, some are ahead in other

subjects

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such

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sports

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and

music

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. To explain it, many people have some god-gifted talents in different things, many of them are interested in

sports

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, and others in

music

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For example

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, in India, Sachin Tendulkar is known as the God of Cricket, he chose a career in cricket

instead

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of academics, and now is a brand ambassador of a BMW Company.

Moreover

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music

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also

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helps to relax your mind. Only academic

subjects

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lead to failure or the students leave school too early because they are depressed without entertainment.

In addition

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this

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sports

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also

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help in their physical fitness and

music

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has proved to help improve the IQ of children. Schools should make rounded education

such

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as make mixed curriculum from which they feel a good atmosphere in the class. In conclusion,

although

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academic classes are beneficial for children,

subjects

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sports

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and

music

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are as important for a bright future.

Submitted by arshpreetmalkana on Mon Jun 05 2023

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

290 words

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Some people say that schools should concentrate on teaching students academic subjets that will be useful for their future careers. Other people say that subjects such as music and sports are also necessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Vehicles using alternative fuel have been available since the past few years, yet they are not common on the roads. What are the reasons for this? How can people be encouraged to use these vehicles?

The continued rise in the world's population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present time. What are the causes of this continued rise. Do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

Every country should have a free health service; even if that means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through this service because they are too expensive. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Some school children buy healthy food from the school cafeteria. However, some buy unhealthy food. What are the reasons for both these situations? Should schools be allowed to sell unhealthy food?