IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The map below is of the town of Garlsdon.A new supermarket (S) is planned for the town.The map shows two possible sites for the supermarket.

The map below is of the town of Garlsdon.A new supermarket (S) is planned for the town.The map shows two possible sites for the supermarket.
#town #garlsdon #supermarket #two #sites
The map below shows the
town
 of Garlsdon and the new
supermarket
 planned for the
town
.Two possible sites for
supermarket
Fix the agreement mistake
supermarkets
show examples
 and
Garlsdon
Correct article usage
the Garlsdon
show examples
 population (65,000)
shown
Add a missing verb
are shown
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the map.
Moreover
 the symbol of industry,housing, countryside,
town
 centre,railway and main roads
illustrated
Add a missing verb
are illustrated
show examples
 with different lines and colours
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the map.
Overall
,building the new
supermarket
 will be so profitable.Because the
supermarket
Add a missing verb
is lacated
show examples
lacated
Correct your spelling
located
 in
town
Add an article
the town
show examples
 centre and it is
closely
Replace the word
close
show examples
 to residential houses and each two industry and
also
railway
Correct article usage
the railway
show examples
 and main roads passes from here. There are three different
town
Change to a plural noun
towns
show examples
 away from the Garlsdon.The name of
these three
Change the determiner
this three town
these three towns
show examples
town
 are Hindon,Bransdon and
Cransdon
,each 3
city
Change to a plural noun
cities
show examples
 located differ long way.Hindon
located
Add a missing verb
is located
show examples
 12 km away,Bransdon 16 km and
Cransdon
 25 km.The
town
 which is belong to
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 population and
located
Add a missing verb
is located
show examples
 the most distance is
Cransdon
(population is 29.000).
Railway
Add an article
The railway
show examples
 only passes from two
city
Change to a plural noun
cities
show examples
(Hindon and
Cransdon
.
Submitted by Ayan on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words town, supermarket, cransdon with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "map" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Accessibility
  • Congestion
  • Economic benefits
  • Environmental impact
  • Foot traffic
  • Green space
  • Job creation
  • Local property values
  • Parking availability
  • Pollution
  • Proximity
  • Public transportation
  • Sustainability
  • Traffic patterns
  • Residential areas
  • Shopping convenience
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