Some people think that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Try for free →
To some, important sanctions for driving offences are the key to reducing incidents.
Whereas
Linking Words
others think that other ways could be more efficient.
This
Linking Words
essay will illustrate both opinions and explain my personal opinion.
Firstly
Linking Words
, not only will strong punishments for violation of the rules reduce the number of accidents directly, but they will
also
Linking Words
force drivers to pay more attention to the road. The fear of serious consequences is bound to encourage people to be less aggressive and more reasonable.
This
Linking Words
rule could ensure that people behave better on the road.
For instance
Linking Words
, in Switzerland, the sanctions have a very elevated financial cost compared to their neighbours , Germany, and there are proportionally fewer incidents. It is important to note ,
however
Linking Words
, that if the punishment is monetary, some will not be able to afford the cost of their mistakes. In order to reduce the number of violations ,the use of other measures,
on the other hand
Linking Words
, could
also
Linking Words
be very effective.
For example
Linking Words
, the system of points in France allows a better following of the rules. The French motorists use their automobiles under the constant pressure of losing points and
consequently
Linking Words
, their driver's licence. The consequences are backed up by fines as well. In conclusion, I strongly believe that an in-between could be possible , combining a financial cost with a possible loss of the license too. I do not think ,
nevertheless
Linking Words
, that penalties are enough to prevent all occurrences, as the greatest way to avoid them is by prevention and education of the next generations of conductors , teaching them at a young age the risks and consequences of offences.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Answer both sides in a more equal way. The second side is shorter, so add one more clear idea there.
task response
Make your own view very clear from the start and keep it the same through the essay.
task response
Use simpler and more direct topic words. Some phrases sound unclear or not natural.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas more smoothly between and within sentences. Some parts have extra commas or awkward joins.
coherence and cohesion
Develop each main point a little more with a short explanation of how or why.
coherence and cohesion
Keep one clear focus in each paragraph. The last paragraph adds a new idea very late.
task response
The essay answers both views and gives your own opinion.
coherence and cohesion
There is a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task response
You use real country examples, which helps support your ideas.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • deterrent
  • repeat offenses
  • infrastructure improvements
  • public awareness campaigns
  • reckless driving
  • traffic management technologies
  • intelligent traffic lights
  • speed cameras
  • public transportation
  • minimize
  • enhance safety
  • allocate funds
  • road signs
  • road safety
What to do next:
Look at other essays: