Some people say that it is necessary to give importance to your career, while others say that it is better to spend time with your family and friends. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some
people
argue that a career is very essential in
one
's life,
thus
they need to allocate more
time
to their
work
,
while
others argue that
people
need to spend more
time
with their loved ones. I believe that
people
should invest more
time
with their family and friends rather than focusing on
work
. On the
one
hand, there are many individuals who filled up their schedule with
work
, as they believe that by working hard, they can boost their career prospects and succeed in the future.
This
is important for some working individuals, as they believe that by working hard and being successful, they can achieve self-satisfaction where they can satisfy their own needs
such
as eating out or shopping.
In addition
, they can spend more of that money without worrying much.
For instance
, my parents are an example. My parents
work
almost every day
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and rarely spend
time
with me and my sister. They believe that by focusing on their jobs, they can boost their income and they can provide me and my sister with a better life.
On the other hand
, other
people
prioritise their
time
with their loved ones, as they think that it will help them to communicate better and boost their
work
performance. Balancing
one
's
work
-life is very beneficial, as it can alleviate
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
mental health problem.
Additionally
,
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
sharing or discussing their
work
problem with their friends or partner, it helps them to clear their minds, concentrate better and become more productive.
For instance
, my neighbour John has been promoted
as
Change preposition
to
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
new CEO of his company. When asked what is the success behind it, he says that he allocated more of his
time
to his family, as he says them spending
time
with them helped him feel better and he was able to concentrate better on his tasks. In conclusion,
although
focusing on
their
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there
show examples
is vital for
one
's life, investing more
time
in their family and friend is more essential. With better mental health, I believe that
people
can prosper more than solely focusing on working.
Submitted by cspheaa on

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