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Writing Samples
Band 6

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #predictions #summarise #features #comparisons
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The graph illustrates the
cities
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 of
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population
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the population
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 has
increase
Change the verb form
increased
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 from four
countries
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 in 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
Overall
Linking Words
, most of the
countries
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has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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 increased in these years. But, only the Philippines was reduced from
the
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apply
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1990 to 2010. In the past years before 2020,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Indonesia
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 and Malaysia’s
population
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 from
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Add an article
the city
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city
Fix the agreement mistake
cities
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 has
increase
Change the verb form
increased
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 faster than
other
Change preposition
in other
show examples
countries
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.
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Indonesia
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 has 10%
population
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 live in
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city
Fix the agreement mistake
cities
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 in 1970, and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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Malaysia has about 30%
population
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 in the
city
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, but in 2020 there have about 50% and 75%
population
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 living in
cities
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from
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Indonesia
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 and Malaysia. Compare with them, the
Philippine
Fix the agreement mistake
Philippines
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 and Thailand only rise to 45% and 30% in 2020 the
population
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 living in the
cities
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 from 31% and 19% in 1970. Back to the future of the 2030 and 2040, the four
countries
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is
Change the verb form
are
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 similar to each other and their
population
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 in the
city
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 both are increasing so fast. For 2030 to 2040
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Malaysia is
top
Correct article usage
the top
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one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
population
Use synonyms
 in the graph, and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Indonesia
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 is
second,
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
third and fourth are
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
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 and Thailand.
Therefore
Linking Words
 the four
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countries
Change noun form
countries'
country's
show examples
Use synonyms
cities
Change noun form
cities'
city's
show examples
population
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 will continue increasing in the future.
Submitted by crystal1989.liu on

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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words cities, population, countries, indonesia, city with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • graph
  • percentage
  • population
  • cities
  • Asian countries
  • 1970
  • 2020
  • predictions
  • 2030
  • 2040
  • estimations
  • urban
  • increasing
  • steadily
  • Japan
  • China
  • rise
  • urbanization
  • South Korea
  • India
  • upward trend
  • slow pace
  • surpass
  • resided
  • projected
  • moderate increase
  • significant surge
  • exceed
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