Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health process as a result. Why do many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem?
In today's busy
life
a major part of employees Add a comma
,life
spend
little Change the verb form
spends
time
on sports
activities. They have no time
and energy during working they
, but Correct pronoun usage
apply
at
their leisure Change preposition
in
time
there are some more important things to do. Add a comma
,time
As a result
, some diseases will appear in the future. In this
essay, I will describe the causes of this
issue and measures that could be done to resolve it.
To begin
with, the population doesn't pay much attention to having sports
exercises regularly . One of the reasons why that happen is a leak of information about consequences . Individuals can't realise that a sedentary lifestyle may cause very important health problems . For instance
, obesity, heart disease, diabetes, some
types of cancer. Correct word choice
and some
Secondly
, it is hard to find time
for sports
working 40 or more hours a week. More important things, such
as housework have to be done. Also
,because of people
's nature
it is hard to motivate themselves, they need support , Add a comma
,nature
for
example
training in groups, but that kind of Add a comma
,example
trainings
is quite expensive.
So,both government and employers should take measures to deal with that issue. Change the wording
training
pieces of training
Firstly
, government
should think about how to Add an article
the government
explain
Add the preposition
toexplain
people
how important active
lifestyle is. Correct article usage
an active
For example
, books for children or social advertisements for adults. Also
, employers should offer more flexible working hours . Furthermore
, they can organise some sports
activities at work to motivate their workers. Besides
, city administration can organise free trainings
for different Change the wording
training
pieces of training
people
. For instance
, in my hometown Jurmala in the summer there are some free trainings for all city dwellers on the beach.
To conclude
, an active lifestyle is very important for our health , but individuals don't think about that . They have too busy life , so some measures have to be done to motivate people
.Submitted by tatjana040792 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!