At the present time, the population of some countries includes relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
In some parts of the world, more distribution of
population
consists of Correct article usage
the population
young
Correct article usage
the young
generation
than Use synonyms
older
one. Correct article usage
the older
Although
Linking Words
this
inclination can be problematic in some cases, Linking Words
this
Linking Words
sessay
will explain why I believe that some of the benefits for the whole society Correct your spelling
essay
is
extremely sufficient to outweigh their drawbacks.
Change the verb form
are
To begin
Linking Words
with
the negatives, one of the most worrying points the demographic data with a great number of Add a comma
,with
young
Add an article
a young
the young
adult
can present is Fix the agreement mistake
adults
this
can Linking Words
acceralate
overpopulation. Correct your spelling
accelerate
This
is because Linking Words
young
Correct article usage
the young
generation
will give more births, which might cause the rising price of Use synonyms
household
. Add an article
the household
Censequently
, the citizens' living standard could be curtailed Correct your spelling
Consequently
due to
the increased cost Linking Words
for
housing. Another pressing concern is the Change preposition
of
firce
job competition in the future. Correct your spelling
fierce
first
Considerning
Correct your spelling
Considering
current
trend of expanding life span, old people sometimes need to Correct article usage
the current
compete
the same openings with young job seekers, whose number is rising, Add the preposition
forcompete
thus
we can assume that the problem Linking Words
Change preposition
of umemployment
umemployment
will be Correct your spelling
unemployment
deterionated
.
Correct your spelling
deteriorated
On the other hand
, in my opinion, there are certain advantages to Linking Words
hold
Wrong verb form
holding
a great deal of
young people, the most obvious of which is Change the quantifier
a lot of
many
plenty of
that
the potential reduction of Correct word choice
apply
tax
burden that Add an article
the tax
a tax
young
Correct article usage
the young
generation
is imposed to cover the cost of Use synonyms
pension
Correct article usage
the pension
retired
Correct article usage
the retired
generation
receives. More Use synonyms
nunber
of young Correct your spelling
number
tax payers
means that less burden for each Correct your spelling
taxpayers
individuals
on Change to a singular noun
individual
this
matter. Linking Words
As a result
, those who are young can be freed up more money to spend Linking Words
their
affairs Change preposition
on their
as well as
those who are old could obtain more Linking Words
pension
. Fix the agreement mistake
pensions
Furthermore
, young workers who have grown up as digital Linking Words
native
should benefit Fix the agreement mistake
natives
to
society. Thanks to new technological Change preposition
apply
invensions
that Correct your spelling
inventions
young
workforce can equip, the country can be Correct article usage
the young
florished
.
In conclusion, Correct your spelling
flourished
whereas
having a number of young population may cause Linking Words
the
low quality of life Correct article usage
a
due to
the increasing living cost and decreasing job Linking Words
vacancines
, Correct your spelling
vacancies
this
should be Linking Words
overwelmed
by the positives Correct your spelling
overwhelmed
such
as less tax obligation per person in order to support the retired elderly and their contribution to modern technology which may well bring about Linking Words
growth
of the nation as a whole.Add an article
the growth
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Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.