IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

People nowadays tend to have children at older ages. Do the advantages of this outweigh the diaadvantages?

#people #children #ages #outweigh #diaadvantages
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Having a child at
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 later
age
Use synonyms
become
Correct subject-verb agreement
becomes
show examples
 more passionate among the society. They decided to postpone
to give
Change the verb form
giving
show examples
 birth at an early
age
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
 some purposes.
Although
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 trend
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 certain benefits, the drawbacks are an edge over. Several benefits are associated with having a baby later
age
Use synonyms
. One of them is,
indivuals
Correct your spelling
individuals
 can set and fix their standard of living in a better way. Many parents want to give a beautiful and
luxury
Replace the word
luxurious
show examples
 lifestyle to their kids,
in
Correct word choice
and in
show examples
 order to make it happen, they work hard to earn more money. Another reason is, they can easily consider their career
life
Use synonyms
 in a proper way. There is no rush to get everything in their
life
Use synonyms
.
Consequently
Linking Words
, they can achieve enormous goals related to their academic and professional
life
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 trend has many downsides to
be consider
Change the verb form
be considered
show examples
. First and foremost, some people are having cut-throat
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
show examples
, where they can not balance their family and career lifestyle together.
As a result
Linking Words
, they easily get more depression and anxiety in their whole
life
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, if they delay
birth
Add an article
the birth
show examples
 of a child, there will be a generation gap between the mother and the baby. In future, it will
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
 them adversely.
For example
Linking Words
, my
grand parents
Correct your spelling
grandparents
show examples
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
got married very early in their teenage time. But my mother
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
married after
20th
Correct article usage
the 20th
show examples
 and now there is a big interval between me and my
grand parents
Correct your spelling
grandparents
show examples
. And ultimately, some women have
chance
Correct article usage
a chance
show examples
 to get
health related
Add a hyphen
health-related
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 congenital anomalies and they may suffer a lot to conceive in an elderly
age
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, there are many advantages to
get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
 pregnant at
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 later
age
Use synonyms
 phase.
Such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 Better financial settlement and
ensure
Wrong verb form
ensuring
show examples
 a
high level
Add a hyphen
high-level
show examples
 standard of living. But health conscious issues and
generation
Correct article usage
the generation
show examples
gab
Correct your spelling
gap
show examples
 may make them physically and psychologically
stress
Change the form of the verb
stressed
show examples
. In my opinion, the disadvantages to
this
Linking Words
 trend
far
Add a missing verb
are far
show examples
 more significant than the upsides.
Submitted by sasanambf on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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