Stress is major problem in workplace, causes and what should be done for it.

It is

undoubtably

Correct your spelling

undoubtedly

show examples

that urban areas around the world increasingly suffer from anxiety and stress is becoming more widespread in many parts of the world. There are several reasons for

this

problem, and various measures could be taken by

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

and individuals to improve the situation. Pressure to perform in the workplace is more widespread and

life

is more difficult than before. The

government

has implemented many solutions. On

one

Correct article usage

the one

show examples

hand, the obvious reason

life

is becoming more difficult for people to live in is they need to be independent and make a lot of effort to earn.

Moreover

, the opportunity to get a job is hard which always makes people feel

under-pressure

Correct your spelling

under pressure

show examples

Also

, socioeconomic pressure impacts the youth specifically.

In other words

, they might attempt suicide.

Furthermore

this

is very dangerous for communities. Despite some obvious reasons described above, there are several actions that

government

and

individual

Fix the agreement mistake

individuals

show examples

could

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

take to solve

this

problem.

Firstly

the best thing to calm down

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

Fix the infinitive

to do

show examples

exercises

such

as walking outside,

Wrong verb form

going

show examples

to the gym, riding a bicycle and

yoga

Add a missing verb

doing yoga

show examples

. One good illustration of

this

when

Add a missing verb

is when

show examples

I had exams I was always terrified and

panic

Wrong verb form

panicked

show examples

so my mom booked for me appointment with a

life

couch she is give me advice if I have

this

feeling I go for

walk

Correct article usage

a walk

show examples

is help

Change the verb form

helps

show examples

a lot to get over the panic.

Secondly

Add a comma

,Secondly

show examples

the

government

has forced all

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

workplaces to make space for a gym inside. In conclusion, it seems to me that

live

Replace the word

life

show examples

becomes more difficult.

However

have to be independent and to

coping

Change the form of the verb

cope

show examples

with her, my opinion to be less

stress

Replace the word

stressed

show examples

you have to do a lot of

exercise

Change to a plural noun

exercises

show examples

to get at less

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

chill and calm with

life

Submitted by maryamabugela on Tue Jun 13 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

290 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Stress is major problem in workplace, causes and what should be done for it.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries, the role of a mother differs in some ways from the role of a father. Why do you think these differences exist? How might parental roles develop in the future?

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think universities should provide practical knowledge rather than theoretical subjects. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that a huge amount of time and money is spent on protection of wild animals, and that this money could be better spent on the human population. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion

These days more father stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work . What could be reason for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?